WASHINGTON, DC – Vice President Dick Cheney has announced that he is a Vampire. At a press conference in the hours before dawn, Cheney stated, “I am an Undead-American.”
Reginald Cunningham III
CHUPACABRAS ARE ALIEN PETS
SAN ANTONIO, TX – Residents of San Antonio are perplexed by a recent series of strange sightings.
GOP GATHERS TO SUMMON NEXT LEADER
SMITHDALE, VA – Since their defeat on Election Day, Republicans have questioned what will be the new direction of their party.
BAT BOY LINES UP TO MEET 'TWILIGHT' STAR
PHILADELPHIA, PA – Whether he’s a fan of the books or just trying to make friends, Bat Boy was spotted waiting in line to meet the star of the upcoming film “Twilight”.
DAY OF THE DEAD ZOMBIE ATTACK
BAJA, MEXICO – Mexican villagers trying to break a dance record on the Day of the Dead were in for an unwelcome surprise.
FATFOOT ON THE VIEW
NEW YORK, NY – Fatfoot, the overweight Sasquatch, was recently discovered to be suffering from bulimia.  Yesterday he appeared on daytime television show The View to discuss his struggle.
TODD PALIN'S ELECTION DAY STUNT
ANCHORAGE, AK – Todd Palin vows to jump 25 election booths with his snowmobile on Election Day.
STRAIGHT TALK EXPRESS TO TIME TRAVEL
PHOENIX, AZ – With his presidential bid seen as lost, John McCain is putting a Flux Capacitor on the Straight Talk Express.