DALLAS — Crazy, biting ants invade by the millions – and kill by the hundreds!
texas
JACKIE KENNEDY: LYNDON JOHNSON KILLED JFK
NEW YORK – Tapes released by Caroline Kennedy reveal that Jackie Kennedy believed Lyndon B Johnson was the mastermind behind JFK’s assassination.
WORLD’S BIGGEST BUTT
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DALLAS, TX – Dionne Washington claims to have the biggest butt in the world.
7-YEAR OLD SOLVES SECRET OF THE UNIVERSE
ELFORD, Texas – For eons, scientists and philosophers have tried to uncover the secret of the universe. Last week, Jimmy Gallagher, 7, learned what it was.
20 STATES TO SECEDE FROM THE UNION!
After the re-election of Barack Obama, 20 states have declared they will secede from the union.
HELP WANTED: NASA NEEDS ASTRONAUTS!
HOUSTON – President Obama is dismantling the U.S. Space Program, but NASA is in desperate need of astronauts.
SELENA GOMEZ AND JUSTIN BIEBER – NUDE!!
DALLAS – Sculptor Daniel Edwards has created a bronze statue of a nude Selena Gomez and her ex-boyfriend, Justin Bieber.