ALIEN IN PHILLY SUFFERS HEATSTROKE

PHILADELPHIA, PA –  As temperatures neared 100 Monday, after hovering in the high 90s during the week, a Southside alien was taken to Mercy Hospital suffering from  heatstroke.

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PhD APE AND MADAM KRISTIN DAVIS

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PHILADELPHIA, PA – As Madam Kristen Davis debates whether to publish her tell-all biography, she has turned to a longtime friend and alleged client for counsel: PhD Ape!

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GRIM REAPER JUST GLAD TO BE PART OF THE TEAM

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PHILADELPHIA – The angel of death reports that he is happy to be doing his part in the ongoing process of devouring human souls.

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OBAMA RIDING HORSE TO INAUGURATION

CHICAGO, IL – President-Elect Barack Obama’s inauguration travel plans are harkening back to a time earlier than any had predicted.

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WORLD'S FATTEST CAT ADOPTED

PHILADELPHIA, PA – Jon and Kate Gosselin, stars of the hit reality show, Jon and Kate Plus 8, have added one supersized mouth to their family this holiday season: Tonya!

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