KEY LARGO, FL – Manigator flees arrest at a McCain rally where he bit a man he claimed was βUn-American.β
john mccain
ICE QUEEN CINDY MCCAIN
SVALBARD, NORWAY β Cindy McCain will return to her ice kingdom following the November elections should her husband not be victorious.
OBATMA AND BAT BOY TOUR U.S.
JOPLIN, MO – The recent unveiling of Obamaβs mutant half brother has guaranteed him the mutant vote.
MCCAIN NEGOTIATES BETWEEN ANGELS & DEMONS

GENEVA, SWITZERLAND – Angels and demons have quietly entered into peace talks, thanks to Senator John McCain!
JOSEPH PLUMMER IS JOE PLUMBER
PASS CHRISTIAN, MS β In last night’s debate, both presidential nominees Barack Obama and John McCain repeated a story about a “Joe Plumber”.
MCCAIN-BORG UPGRADES FOR DEBATE
DALLAS, TX – Republican presidential nominee John McCain announced Monday he will suspend his campaign yet again in order to upgrade his cybernetic systems.
FIRST EVER INTERSTELLAR EXTRADITION
SAFFORD, AZ. – A fugitive’s abduction by aliens has prompted a hasty interstellar extradition treaty, now under review by the U.S. Senate.
KEATING FIVE REUNITE FOR BASKETBALL GAME
WASHINGTON, DC β Senator John McCain took a few hours out of his busy campaign schedule to attend the annual basketball game that reunites βThe Keating Five.β
MCCAIN USES ALIENS TO GET TOWN HALL QUESTIONS
NASHVILLE, TN β Obama for America campaign manager, David Plouffe, has accused Republican Presidential candidate Senator John McCain of using alien technology








