NASHVILLE, TN – Obama for America campaign manager, David Plouffe, has accused Republican Presidential candidate Senator John McCain of using alien technology
Month: October 2008
SUPER-SARAH PALIN KNOCKS OUT JOE-TOX
I was as happy as Joe Biden at a Hair Club for Men conference to see Sarah Palin crush Joe Biden in the VP debate last week. Sarah had me at “Hey, can I call you Joe?”
BIGFOOT BABY IS A BRAT!
ALTURAS, CA – A frazzled, young government researcher says she’s sick and tired of caring for the baby Bigfoot who was captured by scientists – because the squalling, rambunctious furball is a brat!
BAILOUT BOY
UPDATE: At a pivotal moment in the nation’s history, America’s newest Deputy Treasury Secretary, Bat Boy, was nowhere to be found. This revelation sent shockwaves through the market and Washington D.C. on Monday.
Where was Bat Boy? He had scurried off to see his favorite band, Vampire Weekend, play a secret show in Brooklyn on Saturday night. He watched and devoured mosquitoes while the nation burned.
OBAMA NUDE
CAMBRIDGE, MA – The shocking photo obtained by Weekly World News reporter Hideaki Tailor reveals that Obama revealed himself during his time at Harvard Law School.
Fossett, Earheart, Hoffa in Bermuda Love Triangle
ATLANTIC OCEAN – Steve Fossett’s airplane and personal items were discovered in Inyo National Forest, California a year after the millionaire adventurer went missing. But there was no sign of a body in the wreckage. Then officials got the call from the captain of a merchant vessel.
EMPEROR BLOOMBERG
NEW YORK, NY – Mayor Mike Bloomberg has crowned himself Emperor of New York. The two term mayor has decided to sidestep legal term limits requiring him to step down next year by crowning himself sovereign ruler.
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UPDATE: PALINTOLOGY REVEALED!
BREAKING NEWS!
These drawings were found left behind on Palin’s debate notes last night showing both her belief in what should be taught in schools but also her view on the natural evolution of woman.
Bat Boy Falls for Meghan McCain
PHOENIX, AZ – At age 13, the mysterious Bat Boy’s hormones are apparently kicking in — he’s developed a crush on Senator John McCain’s daughter Meghan!