CHICAGO, IL – In the latest issue of O Magazine, Oprah reveals that during years of struggling with rollercoaster weight gain/loss she had one consistent shoulder to lean on – Tonya’s!
LAS VEGAS, NV – Following a 13-day trial and 13 hours of jury deliberation, OJ Simpson was convicted on 11 varying charges.
WASHINGTON, DC – President-Elect Obama asserted influence this weekend, advising President Bush on which holiday choir to pick for the White House – and they’re aliens!
PHILADELPHIA, PA – Jon and Kate Gosselin, stars of the hit reality show, Jon and Kate Plus 8, have added one supersized mouth to their family this holiday season: Tonya!
HOUSTON, TX – Billionaire energy mogul T. Boone Pickens has announced a revolutionary alien technology as the next step in the campaign for US energy independence.
ATLANTA, GA – Following four extra weeks of campaigning, Democratic challenger, Jim Martin lost by an impressive 15 percent.
SPRINGFIELD, IL – In a move widely seen as political pandering, the Governor of Illinois announced an unusual choice for Obama’s seat in the Senate.
LOS ANGELES, CA – After revealing herself in the MTV documentary “Britney: For the Record”, Britney Spears turned to an old friend for support.
CHICAGO, IL – With the economy continuing its roller-coaster ride this week, retailers are expecting a different type of crowd.
STAMFORD, CT – Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, debuted a new entrée just in time for Thanksgiving.