WASHINGTON, DC – Shutdown crisis causes U.S. to turn to the alien, P’Lod, for guidance and financial aid.
white house
BLACKBIRDS ATTACK KENTUCKY!
Millions of birds are attacking a small Kentucky city – destroying buildings, parks and injuring thousands of citizens.
OBAMA AND TIGER WOODS PARTY IN MIAMI!
President Obama played golf Sunday with Tiger Woods and then the two men went out and had a wild night in Miami.
PIERS MORGAN DEPORTED BACK TO ENGLAND
The White House, responding to a petition, is deporting CNN host Piers Morgan back to England.
CHICAGO TO BE RENAMED "OBAMA CITY"
The Mayor of Chicago, Rahm Emanuel, reportedly announced that the city will be renamed. It will now be – Obama City!
JAY-Z NAMED SECRETARY OF STATE
President Obama named Jay-Z his new Secretary of State. He will replace Hillary Clinton in January of 2013.
NFL TO SHUT DOWN BY 2020
The NFL announced that due to injury lawsuits and President Obama’s latest initiative, it will shut down in 2020.
DRONES TARGET RAND PAUL
Soon after Rand Paul ended his filibuster on drones, the White House ordered drones to follow the Kentucky Senator.
FOURTH OF JULY ALIEN INVASION
WASHINGTON, DC – Alien warriors for Planet Gootan planned to attack Earth today, but the invasion has been averted – thanks to President Obama’s secret negotiations!