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thanksgiving

VIKINGS EXPRESS DISMAY AT NOT BEING INVITED TO THANKSGIVING

November 24, 2021 by Dart Holiday

Anthropologists recently confirmed that Vikings reached the shores of North America one thousand years ago. They also confirmed that these Nordic explorers felt dissed. Apparently, they weren’t invited to the … READ MORE

Categories Headlines Tags pilgrims, thanksgiving, vikings

OK BOOMER! MILLENNIALS CANCEL THANKSGIVING

November 28, 2019November 28, 2019 by Frank Lake

They’ve had enough with boomers and the way they have ruined everything for the generations that follow them. In another effort to simplify life, millennials have decided that Thanksgiving is … READ MORE

Categories Headlines Tags gluten-free, thanksgiving, vegans

TURKEY PARDONS TRUMP!

November 25, 2019 by Frank Lake

President caught in Thanksgiving quid pro quo This afternoon, Pilgrim, a 38-pound turkey from northern Virginia pardoned President Donald Trump in an act of kindness, compassion, and charity for Thanksgiving. … READ MORE

Categories Headlines Tags gobble gobble, thanksgiving, trump, turkey, turkey pardon

ATTACK OF THE TURKEYS!

November 23, 2012 by Tap Vann

After the turkey that President Obama was murdered, wild turkeys across the country have been on the attack.

Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags attack, gobble gobble, thanksgiving, turkey, turkeys, wild turkeys

TUNA BOY

November 24, 2011 by Frank Lake

NEW JERSEY –  A rare mutation happened to Fred Alan on the way to his Thanksgiving feast.  His head turned into a Tuna!

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Categories Headlines, Mutants, TopStory Tags Bat Boy, bat boy lives, half-man, Jersey City, mutant, Mutants, thanksgiving, Tuna Boy

ZOMBIE TURKEYS

November 25, 2010 by J.B. Smitts

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The U.S. Center for Disease Control has issued a warning:  zombie turkeys are on the loose!

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Categories Headlines, Mutants, TopStory Tags Mutants, thanksgiving, turkey, turkeys, zombie attack, zombies

BAT BOY BALLOON

November 24, 2010 by J.B. Smitts

NEW YORK – Bat Boy fans, take to the streets!  The mutant’s balloon has been removed from the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade!

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Categories Aliens, Celebs, Headlines, Mutants, TopStory Tags Bat Boy, Going Mutant, new york, thanksgiving

ALIENS BUY UP BLACK FRIDAY DEALS

November 28, 2008 by Carl Woodward

CHICAGO, IL – With the economy continuing its roller-coaster ride this week, retailers are expecting a different type of crowd.

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Categories Aliens, TopStory Tags Aliens, amazon.com, best buy, chicago, economy, illinois, newsweek, recession, thanksgiving, wal-mart

FAT CAT DEBUTS TURBACONDUCKEN

November 27, 2008 by Carl Woodward

STAMFORD, CT – Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, debuted a new entrée just in time for Thanksgiving.

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags connecticut, stamford, thanksgiving, tonya, turkey, world's fattest cat, worldsfattestcat

PhD APE AXES AXL'S PROBLEMS

November 24, 2008 by Carl Woodward

LOS ANGELES, CA – Following scathing reviews for his long overdue album Chinese Democracy, Axl Rose made a call to his former therapist.

Categories Celebs Tags axl rose, california, gnr, guns n roses, los angeles, phd ape, rolling stone, ted stevens, thanksgiving

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