CHAOS CLOUD HOVERS OVER INDIANA
INDIANAPOLIS, IN – The Chaos Cloud has made another appearance in a U.S. state, this time descending upon Indiana.
Monthly Archives: October 2008
DEBT COLLECTION NINJAS
NEW YORK, NY – Due to the economic crisis banks, credit, and collection agencies are employing ninjas to collect outstanding payments.
ICE QUEEN CINDY MCCAIN
SVALBARD, NORWAY – Reports have emerged claiming that Cindy McCain, wife of Republican Presidential nominee John McCain, will return to her ice kingdom following the November elections should her husband not be victorious.
QUIT BEING A SISSY AND GET RUDE
I’m madder than chair-tossing hoops coach Bobby Knight with road rage about a new survey I just read saying that Americans are too rude!
OBATMA AND BAT BOY TOUR U.S.
Obatma has been on a road tour with Bat Boy rallying support for the Democratic candidate. The two are making appearances in key swing states, happily handing out stickers and posing for pictures.
CHAOS CLOUD SCARES CLEVELAND
CLEVELAND, OHIO – The Chaos Cloud has put the fear into Cleveland residents!
PHD APE TO COUNSEL GUY RITCHIE
Following last week’s revelation of the split between film director Guy Ritchie and pop star Madonna, the renowned psychologist PhD Ape offered to help Ritchie during the difficult times ahead.
MANIGATOR SPOTTED ON GEORGIA BEACH
JEKYLL ISLAND, GA – A terrifying creature with the head of a man and the scaly body of an alligator was seen making its way along Georgia’s Jekyll Island – and frightened scientists are pleading with citizens to stay away!
GIANT SQUID PLAGUES ICELAND
REYKJAVIK, ICELAND – Already crippled by their economic crisis, the Icelandic government has now been festooned with “ghost ships” sailing into port.
LYING & CHEATING MADE AMERICA GREAT
I’m madder than a schoolteacher with a rotten apple over the big hubbub about kids cheating in school. A government study that just came out says 70 percent – seven of 10 – high school students fessed up that they cheat on tests. Thank heavens, I say!
