WASHINGTON, DC – Alien warriors for Planet Gootan planned to attack Earth today, but the invasion has been averted – thanks to President Obama’s secret negotiations!
independence day
CHAVEZ COPENHAGEN CLIMATE SPEECH
COPENHAGEN – When Hugo Chavez addressed the Copenhagen climate summit in his native tongue, all waited with eager hearts.
STATUE OF LIBERTY REOPENS
NEW YORK, NY – The Statue of Liberty is opening to visitors again on July 4th. Police are on high alert for America’s favorite mutant, Bat Boy.
ED ANGER SAYS: IT'S 'IN DEPENDS DAY'!
I’m madder than a wet firecracker! Tomorrow is Independence Day, the 4th of July, but our great nation is going down the toilet.
ED ANGER: OBAMA DECLARES IRAN-DEPENDENCE DAY!
I can’t believe it: Obama just invited a bunch of crazy foreigners to a Fourth of July party!
QUIT BEING A SISSY AND GET RUDE
I’m madder than chair-tossing hoops coach Bobby Knight with road rage about a new survey I just read saying that Americans are too rude!
PALIN SPENDS COLUMBUS DAY ON WITCH HUNT
WASILLA, AK – Representatives from the McCain Campaign have confirmed that Vice Presidential candidate, Governor Sarah Palin, will spend the Columbus Day holiday on a witch hunt.