Orthodontist Gerald Fixit was sleeping soundly when he was abruptly awakened by a rumbling. “My house started to shake,” said Fixit. “There were intense, bright lights shining into my window, blinding me.
“No one would’ve believed that beneath a Middle Eastern desert extraterrestrials were conducting a vast, worldwide surveillance operation,” Israeli Army Major Joseph Dov revealed to Weekly World News. “That is, until we found them!”
Late last week, NASA received a desperate — and surprise — SOS from the planet Pluto. “They wanted us to send heat lamps immediately,” explained Communications Officer Sunny Cavalier. “They need them to combat global cooling.
Beach goers were startled last Sunday when a sonic boom erupted over this seaside community.