ATLANTA, GA – Following four extra weeks of campaigning, Democratic challenger, Jim Martin lost by an impressive 15 percent.
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LINCOLN RESURRECTED FOR OPEN SENATE SEAT
SPRINGFIELD, IL – In a move widely seen as political pandering, the Governor of Illinois announced an unusual choice for Obama’s seat in the Senate.
GOP GATHERS TO SUMMON NEXT LEADER
SMITHDALE, VA – Since their defeat on Election Day, Republicans have questioned what will be the new direction of their party.
CHAOS CLOUD COVERS GUANTANAMO BAY
GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA – Rumors that President-elect Barack Obama will close the Guantanamo Bay prison has left more than just humans concerned.
MCCAIN NEGOTIATES BETWEEN ANGELS & DEMONS
GENEVA, SWITZERLAND – Angels and demons have quietly entered into peace talks, thanks to Senator John McCain!
Undead Demand Health Insurance
Washington, DC – The nation’s undead community is demanding the right to health insurance—and it is a battle it can win, say experts.
McCain Challenges Obama to a Duel
Presidential nominee John McCain wants fellow nominee Barack Obama to put his campaign ads away and instead settle the election like gentlemen—by having a duel!
The bold challenge, publicly issued by McCain’s feisty Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin, would spare the American people from the typical smear campaigns and save millions of dollars in citizens’ donations, according to McCain.