JAY-Z NAMED SECRETARY OF STATE

President Obama named Jay-Z his new Secretary of State. He will replace Hillary Clinton in January of 2013.

GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN 2013

WASHINGTON, DC –  Shutdown crisis causes U.S. to turn to the alien, P’Lod, for guidance and financial aid.

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FOURTH OF JULY ALIEN INVASION

WASHINGTON, DC – Alien warriors for Planet Gootan planned to attack Earth today, but the invasion has been averted – thanks to President Obama’s secret negotiations!

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OBAMA GIVES HIMSELF A RAISE

WASHINGTON, DC –  President Obama issued an Executive Order raising his salary to $1 million per year.

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