Folks, I’m so steamed I could cook a bald eagle on my forehead! President Trump, God bless his red, white, and blue soul. He threw the greatest military parade this country’s seen since we sent Saddam packing in ’91, and what do we get? A bunch of whining, flag-hating hippies clogging the streets with their … READ MORE
Folks, it’s your ol’ pal Ed Anger, and I’m so steamed I could fry an egg on my forehead and serve it with a side of righteous fury! The eggheads in Washington and Silicon Valley have gone and cooked up a doozy this time. And I’m here to blow the lid off their latest scam! … READ MORE
Well, folks, I’m madder than a hornet in a windstorm, and it’s all because of these blasted tariffs that President Trump just slapped on the world like a big ol’ “Made in America” sticker! I’m telling you, I’ve been steaming ever since I heard about this “Liberation Day” nonsense—10% on everything coming into the good … READ MORE
I’m madder than a porcupine in a balloon factory over this Zelensky-Trump-Vance circus in the Oval Office last week! That meeting got my blood pressure higher than a cat’s back in a dog pound. I’m talking about that so-called “meeting” between President Trump and that Ukrainian fella, Zelensky. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love … READ MORE
Former President Donald Trump surprised insiders today by announcing that he will not run for president in 2024. Instead, he declared that he’s entering the ring to lead the 2024 insurrection. At one of his patented rallies in Podunk, South Dakota, in front of a worshipful audience, Trump stunned the crowd when he said, “I … READ MORE
“It could be bigger than this past Christmas season!” enthused entrepreneur Wink DePalma, president and founder of Traumatoyzed Inc., speaking of his upcoming line of Impeachment Toys. “Let’s face it, the impeachment trial will be a lot funnier than the hearings, with all these stone-faced old white Senate guys trying hard not to laugh, cry … READ MORE
Weekly World News has learned that Russian President, Vladimir Putin will be joining the campaign of Donald J. Trump for the 2020 election. In the coming weeks, the two men will be making joint appearances in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Michigan, New Mexico, and Minnesota. UNWAVERING SUPPORT FOR TRUMP Putin told this reporter (at a bar in … READ MORE
President caught in Thanksgiving quid pro quo This afternoon, Pilgrim, a 38-pound turkey from northern Virginia pardoned President Donald Trump in an act of kindness, compassion, and charity for Thanksgiving. Pilgrim is a leader among turkeys at Gobbler’s Rest in Blacksburg, Virginia. On Friday he held a press conference. Pilgrim told reporters (though his turkey … READ MORE
Aliens from the planet Gootan have seized the brain of Rudy Giuliani, the former mayor of New York City and the personal lawyer of President Donald J. Trump. Gootan-X-118-L, the overlord of Gootan—all inhabitants of the planet share its name, with minor variations—announced the seizure in a press release sent last week. According to the … READ MORE
Subpoenaed by Congress. The only being who can tell the truth! Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff shocked many in Washington by subpoenaing Ph.D. Ape to testify to Congress with regard to the impeachment of President Trump. There has been a great deal of confusion and controversy surrounding the impeachment inquiry that was launched in the … READ MORE