Couple Attacked by Goldfish!

Last month, following a lovely dinner at Japaneteria, David and Jane Bennett were celebrating their honeymoon in the middle of Weller Lagoon when David’s amorous advances became a little more than the boat could handle.

Fly-Eyed Baby!

A local hospital recently revealed that Allan Collinson, son of Ted and Dede Collinson, was born with fragmented, refracted eyes. “At first I thought they were just really, really bright,” said his proud but confused mother.