WASHINGTON – The U.S. government is reportedly mandating that all American school kids eat pink slime.
U.S. LAUNCHES INTERNET WAR
WASHINGTON – U.S. lawmakers have reportedly authorized the army to begin “kinetic military actions” – to take place on the Internet.
OBAMA RENAMES GOV’T: “FEDERAL FAMILY”
WASHINGTON, DC – The White House has officially renamed the U.S. Government of the U.S. Federal Family.
YELLOWSTONE PARK, WY – Scientists announced that a super volcano exists underneath Yellowstone National Park.
BLUE UFO OVER VIRGINIA
CENTERVILLE, VA – A blue UFO was confirmed over Virginia last night!
Bat Boy Gets Passport
Weekly World News investigative reporters have discovered that the U.S. government has issued Bat Boy a passport for international travel!