FBI ARREST BAT BOY AT NYC COMEDY CLUB

Last night the FBI finally got their mutant!  They rushed into Stand Up NY, a popular comedy club on the Upper West Side, and arrested Bat Boy!

FACEBOOK TO CHARGE USERS!

BREAKING –  Facebook, a public company, has reportedly announced a bold new plan – charging users?

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ELECTRONIC TATTOO

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The government will be using electronic tattoos to monitor “suspicious” citizens.

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FBI MEMO PROVES ALIENS AT ROSWELL!

WASHINGTON, DC –  A recently released memo by the FBI proves that aliens did land in Roswell, New Mexico.

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SEIU TO UNIONIZE LEMONADE STANDS

PEORIA, IL – Federal authorities are helping SEIU unionize lemonade stands across the country.

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CHINESE SPIES INVADE AMERICAN SWIMMING POOLS

PHILADELPHIA – Chinese spies, living in the U.S., haven taken over American swimming pools.  Americans are burning up!

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ALIENS RUN FOURTH BRANCH OF GOVERNMENT

WASHINGTON, DC – The Washington Post unveiled the first installment of its Top Secret America series, revealing that much of America is now being controlled by aliens.

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