Tag Archive | "obesity"

MICHELLE OBAMA PREGNANT!

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WASHINGTON – The White House announced today that Michelle Obama is pregnant with the couple’s third child.

TWINKIES: THE NEW SUPERFOOD!

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CHAPEL HILL, NC – Nutrition expert, Dr. Nicholas Perricone, has added Twinkies to his list of superfoods.

THE FAT POLICE ARE COMING!

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WASHINGTON – The Obama Administration has formed the world’s first Fat Police unit. They’re mission: arrest the obese.

STUDY: HALLOWEEN CANDY MAKES KIDS SMARTER

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CAMBRIDGE, MA – A new study out of the Harvard School of Nutrition shows that children who eat bags of Halloween candy have higher IQs.

WHITE HOUSE BANS FRENCH FRIES IN AMERICA

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WASHINGTON, DC – President Obama issued an Executive Order banning the production and/or consumption of French Fries!

STUDY: WATCHING TV WILL KILL YOU

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A new study found that watching too much television will cut 10-15 years off your life.

MCDONALD’S ADDS PROZAC TO HAPPY MEALS

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Bowing to pressure from health advocates and the government, McDonald’s is putting “happy” in the Happy Meal.

“EAT YOUR PEAS” SUMMIT

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WASHINGTON, DC – President Obama called a “Peas Summit” to reignite the debt ceiling talks.

RONALD MCDONALD SENTENCED TO DEATH!

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WASHINGTON – The U.S. Justice Department has ordered Ronald McDonald put to death.

DOCTORS WON’T TAKE FAT PATIENTS!

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WASHINGTON – Under Obamacare, doctors can now refuse obese patients. And they are doing it!