WASHINGTON, DC – President Obama issued an Executive Order banning the production and/or consumption of French Fries!

The White House has had enough with the obese in America.  “Americans can no longer be trusted to eat the right food,” said Michelle Obama to the National Nutrition Association (NNA).  Soon after, President Obama issued an Executive Order banning French Fries in America.

“Any restaurant serving french fries will be heavily fined, as will any individuals eating french fries in public OR in their own home,” said Jay Carney, the White House Press Secretary.

Carney told WWN that obesity is a major health epidemic in the United States and that this is the first of “many executive orders” that President Obama will issue that will serve to control what Americans eat.

“We have to make America great again, and we can’t be a great country with so many overweight people,” said Carney

Fines for serving French Fries in a restaurant start at $5,000 per plate and for consumers – if you are caught eating one serving of French Fries that will cost you $200.

How will the Administration police all restaurants and homes.

“First off, we will be shutting down all French Fry production lines in America, so we will cut of the source of this evil food.  Secondly, we will encourage all Americans to report on their neighbors and friends.  If you see something, say something,” said First Lady Michelle Obama.

Even if it hurts business, restaurants should exchange their top dishes for healthier items with less fat, salt and sugar and they should begin serving smaller portions, Obama said. As an example the First Lady offered this; instead of French fries, restaurants should serve apple slices or carrots with hamburgers and they can use less butter and cream even if it compromises taste.

Speaking at a local Olive Garden restaurant in Hyattsville, MD, Mrs. Obama joined senior management of Darden for a press conference. “This is a breakthrough moment in American history.  We will be come a healthy nation again.”

The boy in this photograph, Tommy Darby of Crystal Lake, IL, was the first to be fined $200.  He had a small fry with his Big Mac.

The White House is encouraging all Americans to eat “an apple a day” and may issue an Executive Order forcing Americans to do so.

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  1. People are not gaining weight from french fries….it's all the high fructose corn syrup the government is adding to all our food as well as all the other poisons you are putting in our food and water and the crap you are spraying in our skies!!!!

  2. I live in south africa! I thought our government was full of crap! This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my life! I am sure that this law goes against the freedom of the people to be allowed to eat whatever they want! It's a waste of time! Why not deal with real issues! Obama, if you want your nation to be great again, start by turning back to God! The american nation is crumbling because in the beginning it was founded on Gods word and the leaders where God fearing people who gave the nation to God! French fries has nothing to do with it! Your country is being judged, just like Israel was judged for turning away from God! You leaders will do anything to keep God out the picture and we are all nothing without God! Turn back to Him now, repent and you shall be forgiven and be great again! Telling people, grown people what they can and can't eat is against all you've stood for! Freedom! The end is nigh!

  3. dudes, its a joke. if this really happened world weekly news wouldn't be the only one to cover it.
    hello? bat boy found in cave, bat boy marries, its just urban prankster on paper.

  4. this is sooo retarded!! they can not tell us what we can and cant eat!! so who ever tries to tell me different that this is not a joke then they to are retarded!! I am going to continue eating whatever I want when I want!!!

  5. Such a self righteous phoney! She shouldn't even be here, should be back in Africa where she belongs. It's no skin off of her ass what I eat and she can kiss my ass. I'll eat whatever I want anytime I wnat.

  6. micheal nedds to get her head straight, america was founded on french frries, if she does this will just eat another hamburger to replace the fries. i'll eat what i won't and i will make them and sell french fries.


  7. I hope that this is a joke… because all the underemployed working for McDonalds and other burger joints could soon find themselves unemployed and nobody would be working anywhere except in government and Wal-mart.

  8. Well who knows what she will do, our public schools are not allowed to serve chocolate milk anymore because she thinks it's wrong, well chocolate milk is better than milk.

    • Oh please. Michelle obama is a fat cow herself. She has no right to talk. Plus have you seen her daughter? A fat pig too. Hypocrites is what they are

  9. who are they to say what we can and cant eat if we wanna be fat so be it we are adults for the kids there is apple slices in stead of fries i bet you they own o french fry truck lol they probally eat them all the time but for real you cant control what we eat take the french fries away they gonna make thier own duhhhhhhh…… what happened to FREEEEEEE SPEECHHHHHHH you have gone way to far

  10. everyones going to hate obama for this. its stupid and very judgemental,just because they eat healthy doesnt mean they need to push it on the rest of us. we might as well just kill ourselfs now. if they run again , nobodys going to vote for them,for the simple fact that there ruining out country. get real. nobodys going to stop eating certain foods. people will eat whatever they want to eat.

    • Signing an executive order of this kind is basically just shoving down peoples throats and dictating what we can and can't do. Taking away a persons right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I eat healthy all the time. Let me treat myself once a week for christs sake! Stupid Belshevik Berry Supreme Idiot Dictator.

  11. This is just another example of the government putting its efforts in the wrong direction. With all the problems facing this country french fries should be so far off the radar, i mean really. Lets get the education system, medicare, welfare, social security, unemployment, etc., etc. fixed.

    • You're absolutely right. Taking care of those problems would most likely take care of the obesity rate itself.

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