LONDON – Britain’s defence ministry has just released declassified UFO files to the general public.
Month: March 2009
PhD APE AND MADAM KRISTIN DAVIS
PHILADELPHIA, PA – As Madam Kristen Davis debates whether to publish her tell-all biography, she has turned to a longtime friend and alleged client for counsel: PhD Ape!
WHITE CASTLE WEDDING
LONDON, OH – An Ohio couple was married at a White Castle. The young groom said, “This is the proudest moment of my life.”
ED ANGER SAYS: TELEPROMPTER KID SHOULD STAY OFF TV
My rabbit ears are bent outta shape! Is Obama the President of the United States or the new American Idol? Cuz he spends more time going on television that he does running the country!
WEEKLY HOROSCOPE: MARCH 23, 2009
Your Weekly Star Guide by Madame Malisa, Renowned Medium & Psychic!
OBAMA’S SPECIAL OLYMPICS GAFFE
UPDATE: Barack Obama’s half-bat half-brother, Obatma, is planning to meet with the Special Olympics committee on Monday to make peace over Obama’s bad joke.
PHYSICIST PROPOSES WITH NUCLEAR BOMB TEST
FIJI – Physicist Matthew Bowen reports that, following the successful detonation of nuclear payload G-417, girlfriend Julie Belcourt is now his fiancée.
OBAMA’S TELEPROMPTER BLOG
WASHINGTON, DC – President Obama’s teleprompter has started its own blog. Millions are anxious to hear the voice behind the voice of the President of the United States.
TAXING AIG BONUSES
WASHINGTON, DC – Passing by an huge majority, the House of Representatives set a new precedent in fiscal oversight: seizing executives’ pants and first-born child!