The thunder of Zeus be upon you, O mortals! The hour of gloom has arrived!
LONDON – A fleet of nine flying objects has been spotted on Google’s Street View in East London. Are aliens revealing themselves to the public?
Is it an alien? A hybrid? Possessed? Or just the creepiest dog in the whole wide world?
BOSTON, MA – Starting tomorrow, the malicious computer worm Conficker.c will turn computers into zombies. Will one of them be yours?
LEON, SAMOA – A Fiji Mermaid was denied federal student aid, and debate over mutant and Islander rights has exploded.
BALTIMORE, MD – A new GPS software program is being offered, which alerts any car driver to the presence of nearby Phantoms of the Opera.
NEW YORK, NY – Much has changed since Philadelphia locked up last year’s title.
MALAWI – Madonna’s adoption hearing in Malawi was held behind closed-doors today, further fueling rumors that she is after an alien child!
ANCHORAGE, AK – Ted Stevens International Airport closed this weekend due to volcanic ash. Former Senator Ted Stevens believes it’s all part of a liberal conspiracy.
I’m madder than a hippie chick who’s run out of hemp tampons!