GAITHERSBURG, MD – Former astronaut Edgar Mitchell stated at a UFO conference that extraterrestrial life exists and the government is actively covering it up.
NEW YORK, NY – Fox News commentator Glenn Beck is taking time out from his various news shows to do comedy.
ANCHORAGE, AK – Ted Stevens International Airport closed this weekend due to volcanic ash. Former Senator Ted Stevens believes it’s all part of a liberal conspiracy.
WASHINGTON, DC – Charles Freeman has withdrawn from consideration as National Intelligence Chair. Another appointee is claimed by the Obama Curse.
JUNEAU, AK – Sarah Palin and Ashley Judd’s squabbling has descended into middle-school madness after only speaking to each other through the press.
BATON ROUGE, LA – After their crushing defeat in November the Republican Party was left with no clear leader.
NEW YORK, NY – Fox News Channel is considering a radical replacement for Alan Colmes’ departure.