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Month: August 2008

Former Jim Jones Acolyte Now CEO of Gatorade!

August 25, 2008 by Shirley Everglade

In need of a leadership shift, Gatorade hired former Jim Jones acolyte Jonathan Ratliff, who not only has been working closely with Gatorade developers for the past 12 years, but also played a pivotal role in the largest mass suicide in the past 1900 years.

Categories Headlines Tags florida, gainesville, gatorade

Exclusive Video! Bat Boy in NYC!

August 24, 2008 by Tap Vann

See exclusive video of Batboy in the NYC subway system. The elusive freak of nature is seen in the Big Apple!

Categories Videos Tags Bat Boy

Corpse Plane To Paradise

August 23, 2008 by Lena Barker

“You’d be surprised how many people die down here every week,” said 63-year-old Timothy Kodera, Airborne Hygiene Consultant for the New York City Sanitation Department.

Categories Headlines Tags corpse, new york, new york city

Middle East Aliens!

February 24, 2020August 23, 2008 by Erik Van Datiken

“No one would’ve believed that beneath a Middle Eastern desert extraterrestrials were conducting a vast, worldwide surveillance operation,” Israeli Army Major Joseph Dov revealed to Weekly World News. “That is, until we found them!”

Categories Aliens Tags Aliens, camels, international, lebanon, mars, martians, middle east

To Little Fanfare, Margaret Thatcher Finally Admits To Being a Zombie

August 22, 2008 by WWN Staff

After years of being hounded by conspiracy theorists and journalists from alternative publications, reporter Michael “Skipper” Entwistle finally got Margaret Thatcher to admit she is a zombie.

Categories Mutants Tags england, international, london, margaret thatcher, prime minister, zombies

Ed Anger Endorses John McCain For President!

August 21, 2008 by Ed Anger

I’m madder than A-Rod’s wife at a day-long Madonna concert. Can someone please explain to me why a Barack Obama presidency would be good for you and me? Me? I don’t get it.

Categories Opinion Tags Ed Anger, john mccain, mccain

Benjamin Franklin's Shocking Secret

August 21, 2008 by Dallas Commagreens

As recounted in his memoirs, Benjamin Franklin flew a kite during a storm to prove that lightning was, in fact, electricity. However, in a newly uncovered first draft of his autobiography, Franklin recounts how he also experienced a short-lived but strange side effect from the experiment.

Categories Celebs Tags benjamin franklin, electricity, philadelphia

Civil War Babies

June 22, 2021August 21, 2008 by Dallas Commagreens

During the Civil War, the Confederacy won a victory in the Battle of Chickamauga and the North’s need for more soldiers forced President Lincoln to create a new branch of the infantry.

Categories Headlines, Mutants Tags babies, baby, civil war, history

Lonely Doctor is Suture Happy

August 19, 2008 by Lena Barker

Playboy Kurt Fulson has never made a proposal on his knee. “Though I have, in fact, just received one there,” the billionaire told Weekly World News.

Categories Headlines Tags colorado, denver, doctor, medical, phone number, surgery

Global Cooling on Pluto?

August 19, 2008 by Erik Van Datiken

Late last week, NASA received a desperate — and surprise — SOS from the planet Pluto. “They wanted us to send heat lamps immediately,” explained Communications Officer Sunny Cavalier. “They need them to combat global cooling.

Categories Aliens Tags Aliens, global warming, nasa, pluto, washington d.c.
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