PhD APE AXES AXL'S PROBLEMS

LOS ANGELES, CA – Following scathing reviews for his long overdue album Chinese Democracy, Axl Rose made a call to his former therapist.

Having spent nearly a week in Washington DC with Senator Ted Stevens, PhD Ape flew to Los Angeles to be with his former client and longtime friend in his time of need.

“Its not my place to comment on the quality of the album,” PhD Ape told reporters in LA.  “However, I will comment on the quality of the artist.  Axl is a top-notch guy.  Really, he is swell.  And all he wants in the world is to entertain and provide his fans with heartfelt music and Grade-A live shows.”
Rose, working with numerous incarnations of his band, Guns ‘N Roses, spent the last decade and a half working on the album most music scholars assumed would never come out.
And now that it has, most wish it never did.
“It took Brian Wilson 37 years to deal with his mental problems and it culminated with Smile, one of the crowning achievements in Rock music of the last 50 years,” Will Dana, managing editor of Rolling Stone said in his review.  “Maybe if Axl had worked for another 20 years it wouldn’t be such a stinking pile of sh–.”
“The backlash against this album has been really hard on Axl,” PhD Ape said.  “14 years is an incredibly long time to pour your heart into something, just to have people tear it to shreds. ”
“I plan on staying with Axl through Thanksgiving so I can work with him on making the best of this situation.  It may seem like he has nothing to be thankful for, but I’m confident that Axl will endure the cold November rain.  Together, we’ll find the paradise city, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.”

5 thoughts on “PhD APE AXES AXL'S PROBLEMS”

  1. Well, if you are looking for your own vacation home, there's a really nice place in Rehoboth Beach. I stayed there one summer and it's just perfect. It's a very roomy three bedroom home with a deck and all the trimmings.
    It's close to route 1 and right down the street from the outlet stores, where you could do all your tax free shopping. But, it's far enough away where you don't have to deal with resort traffic. And there's plenty of parking to invite your friends from the city for a weekend down at the shore.
    Rehoboth Beach is only two miles away, so you could work on your tan every morning. There's an amusement park and arcades right on the boardwalk to keep the kids occupied so you can have some time to yourself.
    The city is clean and crime-free, with lots of great restaurants go have lunch and dinner. All the kids attractions close down after ten o'clock, but the bars stay open until one in the morning. There is nothing quite like going out with all your friends, and finishing your night sitting on the sand and staring out into the ocean.
    Best part about this place is that it has a mother in law suite with a separate entrance. The suite has its own kitchen, living room, bedroom and bathroom. So you could pay your mortgage by renting it out, while still having a place to call your own.
    I really wish I could buy this place myself. The owners are retiring and want to travel. And you won't find anyone else willing to part with a place like this at that price. But I got laid off recently, which put an end to my plans of acquiring this place.
    So, take a look: http://www.homeinrehoboth.net They have lots of photos there.

    Reply

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

WWN STORIES