McCain Challenges Obama to a Duel

Presidential nominee John McCain wants fellow nominee Barack Obama to put his campaign ads away and instead settle the election like gentlemen—by having a duel!
The bold challenge, publicly issued by McCain’s feisty Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin, would spare the American people from the typical smear campaigns and save millions of dollars in citizens’ donations, according to McCain.

Sarah Palien?

Following Sarah Palin’s emergence on the national stage, the blogosphere lit up with reports that Governor Palin does not actually hail from Wasilla, Alaska but from a planet known as Wazeela.
The tiny planet, which is located some 37,000 miles due east from the Sun, is known to be rich with fossil fuels that lie beneath snow-capped peaks.
Internet reports also cited the particularly short 5-month gestation period of Wazeela females as proof that Palin was, in fact, a Palien.

UFO ALIEN TURNS HEADS IN MINNESOTA

Without warning, the UFO Alien arrived in Minnesota today, turning the heads of Republicans and Democrats alike.
Some commentators could not help but notice that the UFO Alien and Cindy McCain possessed similar headshapes.
Many insiders felt that a meeting of the minds between Cindy McCain and the UFO Alien was imminent and could take place prior to her address to the convention.