Celebs

UFO ALIEN TURNS HEADS IN MINNESOTA

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Without warning, the UFO Alien arrived in Minnesota today, turning the heads of Republicans and Democrats alike.
Some commentators could not help but notice that the UFO Alien and Cindy McCain possessed similar headshapes.
Many insiders felt that a meeting of the minds between Cindy McCain and the UFO Alien was imminent and could take place prior to her address to the convention.

BLAKE ANGUISH AT OPEN

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James Blake and US hopes have crashed at the US Open.
Blake lost a close match despite being powered by a strong serve, superior forehand and the protein nourishment that his nightly diet of thousands of mosquitoes provides.