NEW YORK, NY – To welcome in the new year, Weekly World News flew in some of the years biggest shakers and news makers for a holiday party.
phd ape
PhD APE MEETS WITH SALTSMAN
MEMPHIS, TN – Ending the year on a high note, PhD Ape has announced he will meet with the man who distributed a racist song to RNC members.
PhD APE JR. ANALYZES SANTA
NEW YORK, NY – Holiday shoppers at Macy’s Department Store were surprised this week when PhD Ape brought his son and niece to meet Santa for the first time.
PhD APE BUMPS INTO SPITZER
FT. LAUDERDALE, FL – During a short break from counseling Madoff investment victims, PhD Ape ran into a client begging for help – Elliot Spitzer!
PhD APE TO COUNSEL SCAM VICTIMS
PALM BEACH, FL – In a move surprising many of his fans and clients, PhD Ape is traveling to Florida in light of the Madoff investment scam – to meet with the victims!
PhD APE JUNIOR!
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Weekly World News is proud to announce the birth of PhD Ape’s first gorilla child!
PhD APE HEADS TO VEGAS
LAS VEGAS, NV – Following a 13-day trial and 13 hours of jury deliberation, OJ Simpson was convicted on 11 varying charges.
PhD APE GOES TO GEORGIA
ATLANTA, GA – Following four extra weeks of campaigning, Democratic challenger, Jim Martin lost by an impressive 15 percent.
PhD APE LENDS SHOULDER TO BRITNEY
LOS ANGELES, CA – After revealing herself in the MTV documentary “Britney: For the Record”, Britney Spears turned to an old friend for support.
PhD APE TAPPED FOR NEW VH1 SHOW
LOS ANGELES, CA – PhD Ape was called in by VH1 to host a new celebrity rehab show.