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phd ape

NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

January 1, 2009 by Reginald Cunningham III

NEW YORK, NY – To welcome in the new year, Weekly World News flew in some of the years biggest shakers and news makers for a holiday party.

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Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags Bat Boy, batboy, big gulp, cheap beer, cryptids, fatfoot, manigator, moonshine, Mutants, new years, new years day, new years eve, new years resolutions, phd ape, soda

PhD APE MEETS WITH SALTSMAN

December 30, 2008 by Carl Woodward

MEMPHIS, TN – Ending the year on a high note, PhD Ape has announced he will meet with the man who distributed a racist song to RNC members.

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Categories Politics, TopStory Tags barack obama, barack the magic negro, chip saltsman, kkk, memphis, phd ape, puff obama parody, puff parody, puff the magic dragon, rnc, rnc chairman, saltsman, tennessee

PhD APE JR. ANALYZES SANTA

February 24, 2020December 24, 2008 by Carl Woodward

NEW YORK, NY – Holiday shoppers at Macy’s Department Store were surprised this week when PhD Ape brought his son and niece to meet Santa for the first time.

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags phd ape

PhD APE BUMPS INTO SPITZER

December 18, 2008 by Carl Woodward

FT. LAUDERDALE, FL – During a short break from counseling Madoff investment victims, PhD Ape ran into a client begging for help – Elliot Spitzer!

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags bubby, democratic party, florida, fort lauderdale, hanukkah, madoff, madoff fraud, madoff victims, palm beach, palm beach country club, phd ape

PhD APE TO COUNSEL SCAM VICTIMS

December 16, 2008 by Carl Woodward

PALM BEACH, FL – In a move surprising many of his fans and clients, PhD Ape is traveling to Florida in light of the Madoff investment scam – to meet with the victims!

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags bernard madoff, bernard madoff fraud, bernardmadoff, bernie madoff, bernie madoff fraud, florida, jews, judaism, palm beach, palm beach country club, phd ape

PhD APE JUNIOR!

December 11, 2008 by Garrett Hawley

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Weekly World News is proud to announce the birth of PhD Ape’s first gorilla child!

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Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags california, oj simpson, phd ape, san francisco

PhD APE HEADS TO VEGAS

December 9, 2008 by Carl Woodward

LAS VEGAS, NV – Following a 13-day trial and 13 hours of jury deliberation, OJ Simpson was convicted on 11 varying charges.

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags oj simpson, ojsimpson, phd ape

PhD APE GOES TO GEORGIA

December 3, 2008 by Carl Woodward

ATLANTA, GA – Following four extra weeks of campaigning, Democratic challenger, Jim Martin lost by an impressive 15 percent.

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Categories Politics, TopStory Tags al gore, atlanta, democrats, election day, georgia, hillary clinton, john mccain, ludacris, mitt romney, phd ape, Politics, president bush, republicans, sarah palin, saxby chambliss, ti

PhD APE LENDS SHOULDER TO BRITNEY

December 1, 2008 by Carl Woodward

LOS ANGELES, CA – After revealing herself in the MTV documentary “Britney: For the Record”, Britney Spears turned to an old friend for support.

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Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags britney for the record, britney spears, britneyspears, california, los angeles, mtv, paparazzi, phd ape

PhD APE TAPPED FOR NEW VH1 SHOW

November 27, 2008 by Reginald Cunningham III

LOS ANGELES, CA – PhD Ape was called in by VH1 to host a new celebrity rehab show.

Categories Celebs Tags california, celebrity rehab, gary busey, los angeles, mexican border, phd ape, reality show, reality tv, vh1
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