MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Al Franken was approved Tuesday to join the US Senate. The Democratic Party will now involve him in their secret plans.

ANCHORAGE, AK – Ted Stevens International Airport closed this weekend due to volcanic ash. Former Senator Ted Stevens believes it’s all part of a liberal conspiracy.

WASHINGTON, DC – After both parties were denied their rightful entry, Obatma and Roland Burris bonded over their rejection.

ST. PAUL, MN – Minnesotans have turned to schoolyard protocol in a last ditch effort to solve their Senate conundrum.

WASHINGTON, DC – Santa Claus has requested a $14 million federal bailout to avoid a crash which could cancel Christmas.

ST. PAUL, MN – The Lizard People have come forward to officially cast their vote for Al Franken.

MINNEAPOLIS, MN – After the presidential election went off without a hitch, many citizens were hoping the Chaos Cloud would vanish. But it isn’t satisfied just yet.