NEW YORK, NY – The country is abuzz over a questionable photo of President Obama checking out a young lady!

WASHINGTON, DC – After shutting down a resolution to honor Michael Jackson this week, Nancy Pelosi was voted House Party Pooper.

WASHINGTON, DC – Just as Bill Clinton did before him, President Barack Obama is now getting help in the White House – from Abraham Lincoln’s ghost!

As Sarah Palin ends her governorship early, Weekly World News invites you to look back on her fascinating life.

MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Al Franken was approved Tuesday to join the US Senate. The Democratic Party will now involve him in their secret plans.

TEHRAN – Despite repeated crackdowns, protests in Iran continue. To calm and distract the populace, Ahmedinejad staged a tribute to Michael Jackson.

COLUMBIA, SC – Governor Mark Sanford returned to work after disappearing over the weekend. Photographic evidence proves he was spending time with his Bigfoot lover.

WASHINGTON, DC – Senator John McCain wants the US to take a more aggressive stance with North Korea, preferably using a ship that bears his name.

HONOLULU, HI – North Korea plans to fire a missile towards Hawaii. Hawaii responded by offering Kim Jong Il a role in a 1960’s style beach movie.

UPDATE: It has leaked that North Korea may fire a missile at Hawaii in early July. Is this the beginning of their invasion?