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Author Archives: Samuel T. Westbrook
JON AND KATE PLUS APE
WERNERSVILLE, PA – As the media attention grows surrounding allegations of infidelity, Jon and Kate Gosselin have asked for professional help from PhD Ape!
TERROR WATCH LIST INCLUDES BAT BOY
WASHINGTON, DC – The Department of Justice has concluded that the FBI’s “Terror Watch List” has more than 24,000 Americans, including Bat Boy, incorrectly included.
REPUBLICANS UNCOVER SWINE FLU CONSPIRACY
WASHINGTON, DC – The growing threat of global pandemic resulting from Swine Flu has health organizations worldwide searching for an origin.
ARLEN SPECTER SWITCHES PARTIES
WASHINGTON, DC – The Hill was shocked as Pennsylvania’s senior Senator, Republican Arlen Specter, announced he was switching parties – because of the babes!
PhD APE GROUP THERAPY: LOHAN, BOYLE AND DOG
HAMPTONS, NY – The demands on his time proving to be too great this week for individual attention, PhD invited three of his clients to a group therapy session at his posh oceanside retreat.
FOREVER 21 PLUS SIZE LINE
NEW YORK, NY – Fashion retailer Forever 21 debuted a new line of clothing for plus-sized women, along with the lines’ special consultant: Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat!
TAX DAY TEA PARTY RECIPE
CHICAGO, IL – As tax day approaches, protest “tea parties” rev up to high gear in preparation for nation-wide movements by sending out recipes for a successful tea party.
POWER PLATE SHAKES UP WORLD’S FATTEST CAT
LOS ANGELES, CA – Partnering with Stevie Nicks and The ShamWOW Guy, Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, is debuting a revolutionary exercise tool to shake off unwanted weight!
ERIC CANTOR AND BRITNEY SPEARS
WASHINGTON, DC – Sparking bipartisan outrage on the Hill, House Minority Whip Eric Cantor admitted to skipping President Obama’s economic press conference to “Get his dance on.”
TAX DAY TEA PARTY
MOBILE, AL – On April 15th, patriots will meet all over this nation to celebrate Tax Day by staging massive tea parties. The tea of choice on the menu – money!
