SCIENTIST ARRIVED FROM 376 YEARS INTO THE FUTURE! WASHINGTON, D.C. — Agents of the Federal Bureau of investigation have hunted down and captured an innocent 46-year-old man. A high-level source says they’re holding him in an isolated farmhouse. They are he’s a time traveler from the year 2398! A source close to the agency says … READ MORE
E EQUALLED MC! Albert Einstein was a genius. Everyone agrees. He helped us rethink the fabric of our universe and also served as a fierce advocate for humanism. But did you know that he was also among the first hip-hop artists? A letter written by Einstein and recently discovered in an archive at the College … READ MORE
IT’S THE SECRET TO A LONG LIFE LONDON — Does your family seem to be plagued by unusual bad luck, with misfortunes such as bankruptcies, mysterious illnesses, and freak accidents befalling one relative after another? It might not be just bad luck — your family could be suffering under a centuries-old curse, experts warn! “We … READ MORE
New group seeks to combat misinformation about misinformation Platforms are rooting out posts and videos that spread unfounded conspiracy theories. But many of them are conspiracy theories about conspiracy theories. Ken Kellerman of the Institute for Truth in Truth has been tracking online stories for the last six years. But as political differences and echo-chamber … READ MORE
Former President Donald Trump surprised insiders today by announcing that he will not run for president in 2024. Instead, he declared that he’s entering the ring to lead the 2024 insurrection. At one of his patented rallies in Podunk, South Dakota, in front of a worshipful audience, Trump stunned the crowd when he said, “I … READ MORE
800-LB FIGURE COMES TO LIFE AND DELIVERS MESSAGE FROM GOD TO TRUE BELIEVERS. BALLINSPITTLE, IRELAND — Pilgrims are flocking to the local Grotto of the Virgin Mary. Witnesses say a marble statue of the Holy Mother moves and talks like a living being! And proof of the miraculous sightings has been provided by a photographer … READ MORE
Dwayne Stafford has an incredible story. Just don’t ask him to tell it. That’s because Stafford may be the most boring person in the world. Fortunately for Stafford, that’s been working in his favor. Police investigations have declared him a ‘Person of Interest’ in over 100 cases, but he’s been released each time, Captain Derek … READ MORE
Will Join Forces with Teddy Roosevelt and Run For President! Scores of Americans assembled in Chicago on Friday night to express their support for the theory that Betty White, the actress who died late last year at the age of 99, would return and join forces with a mummified Theodore Roosevelt to run for president. … READ MORE
ALBANY, NY — A shapely female alien accused former NY Governor, Andrew Cuomo, of groping her breasts. And the bizarre incident nearly sparked an interstellar war! That is the mind-boggling claim of a source close to the District Attorney for the state of New York, who uncovered evidence of the alleged 2021 encounter. She presented … READ MORE
STRIPPER BAKED IN CAKE CAUSES HAVOC AT BACHELOR’S PARTY AND BAR MITZVAH “It just wasn’t Kosher!’ declares Bar Mitzvah boy’s Mom. Police descended upon Cross-Eyed Betty’s Bakery in Brooklyn today after two mishandled orders resulted in a stripper being baked into a six-foot cake and delivered to a Long Island bar mitzvah while a much … READ MORE