LOS ANGELES, CA – The notorious doctor of Michael Jackson will likely be charged with involuntary manslaughter!
michael jackson
2009 IN REVIEW
Greetings sentients! It is I, your humble ambassador for the edification on all things epicurean, Mygar. Today I shall be providing a Year in Review.
MICHAEL JACKSON ULTRASOUND
LONDON – A set of British parents believe they have seen Michael Jackson in their baby’s ultrasound!
MICHAEL JACKSON SEANCE
LONDON – TV channel Sky One broadcast a live seance where the host tried to contact Michael Jackson’s ghost!
MICHAEL JACKSON FROZEN
LOS ANGELES, CA – Rumor has it that Michael Jackson’s mother is keeping his corpse frozen so she can continue visiting him!
MICHAEL JACKSON WAS TO BUY YANKEES?
BRONX, NY – It was reported that Michael Jackson was to trade in his famed sequined glove for a baseball mitt. The late eccentric millionaire was to buy the Yankee franchise — so he could play center field.
MICHAEL JACKSON HOMICIDE
LOS ANGELES, CA – British papers report that LaToya Jackson believes her brother Michael was murdered as part of a conspiracy. Weekly World News sat down with Ms. Jackson to learn more.
PELOSI REJECTS MICHAEL JACKSON RESOLUTION
WASHINGTON, DC – After shutting down a resolution to honor Michael Jackson this week, Nancy Pelosi was voted House Party Pooper.
JOHN MAYER AT MICHAEL JACKSON'S MEMORIAL
LOS ANGELES, CA – John Mayer performed at Michael Jackson’s memorial last night. Sources confirm that Mayer was never invited and instead snuck in.