Today is Veteran’s Day, when we take a minute between 50% off mattress sales and Hitler Channel marathons to remember all the brave men who fought for America!

So we’re getting closer all the time to getting that DMV health care! The first bunch of jackasses voted for it, and now its up to the other gang of crooks to decide.

During that Watergate thing, they used to say “follow the money.” Now it’s more like “follow the ambulance!”

So the Commies lost two out of three big votes last night!

I feel as crazy as a bedbug in a cat house!

Man, this week just keeps getting better and better. By which I mean worse and worse!

I’m madder than Joe Lieberman at a popularity contest!

I’m madder than a fat kid at the end of the buffet line when the rice pudding is all gone!

So now the experts are telling us animals are bad for planet Earth and we need to get rid of them!

I guess the Teleprompter Kid has nothing better to do than get mad that not everybody loves him.