parades

“Trump’s Tank-Tastic Triumph Trampled by Traitorous Tantrums!”

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Folks, I’m so steamed I could cook a bald eagle on my forehead! President Trump, God bless his red, white, and blue soul. He threw the greatest military parade this country’s seen since we sent Saddam packing in ’91, and what do we get? A bunch of whining, flag-hating hippies clogging the streets with their … READ MORE

MY AMERICA: “I HATE ST. PATRICK’S DAY”

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Listen up, you green-beer-guzzling, shamrock-waving lunatics—I’ve had it up to my eyeballs with this St. Patrick’s Day baloney! Every March, the whole country turns into a bunch of giggling, emerald-clad nitwits, prancing around like leprechauns on a bender, and I’m madder than a wet hen in a hailstorm about it! This holiday is nothing but … READ MORE