OBAMA CANCELS 2012 ELECTIONS

WASHINGTON – President Obama announced yesterday that he is canceling the 2012 elections, due to the jobs crisis.
In a speech delivered in Raleigh, North Carolina, President Obama made clear that there will be no new significant government measures to address the most severe jobs crisis since the Great Depression of the 1930s.
But he startled the crowd when he revealed his “one transformative idea”.  He told the crowd that he had a brilliant idea for reducing spending and for helping put Americans back to work.  He announced that he signed an Executive Order canceling this year’s midterm elections, scheduled for November 6th, 2012.
President Obama said in his speech that spending a millions of dollars on election campaigns is something that “Americans can’t afford. We need to put that money back into the economy.”  President Obama issued the Executive Order, effective immediately.  The President put a halt to all preparations being done for the November elections – on a local, state and federal levels.

“You don’t change horses in the middle of a raging stream,” said White House interim Chief of Staff Pete Rouse.  “The President feels that we need to keep the lawmakers we have in place, until his agenda is fully passed or the economy is turned around, whichever comes first.  If the elections were to go forward, the President is afraid that a new Congress will become gridlocked and he won’t be able to ram his agenda through.”
In his speech, Obama also trumpeted a plan for investment in infrastructure and transportation as a significant jobs program.  He said he would pay for the new  investment in transportation by taking all the money that the government would have spent on the midterm elections and putting that into union construction jobs.
“What’s the big deal?” said Bill Daley, Senior Advisor to the President. “There’s going to be elections in two years.  People can’t wait? We waste too much money on elections.”  Asked if the President would cancel the 2014 elections as well, Axelrod said, “That depends if the President can get the 22nd amendment repealed in the next two years.  If he can, then sure, he’ll let the elections go forward. Why not?”
Republicans were quick to denounce the Executive Order.  “He’s not a dictator, he can’t just cancel elections. This is an outrage,” said Senator John McCain.  But John McCain was seen laughing as he left the White House last night.  Some said Obama hugged a smiling McCain, then patted him on the butt.
Senator McCain’s campaign manager, Mark Buse, told WWN off the record (sorry Mark) that “Yeah, John’s happy that he gets to remain a Senator and he did make a back-room deal with Obama, but what am I going to do now?  I’m out of work.”    Lindsey Graham told Buse that he could “get a job on one of the new road projects Obama is setting up.  It’ll be good for you to work with your hands.”
So don’t worry about “rocking the vote” or “getting out the vote” or even just “voting” this November, 2012.   It’s canceled.  Come back in two years…

89 thoughts on “OBAMA CANCELS 2012 ELECTIONS”

  1. Obama is way out of control on this, canceling mid-term elections??? Next thing he will be extending his presidency, extending welfare, extending unemployment. This guy should just extend everything that no one has to work for. Maybe he will bring bristol palin into his cabinet and extend something to her!
    Was this David Axelrod's master plan?

    Reply
  2. I agree with Obama. Most people in this country don’t vote anyway. Forget all the men and women who sacrificed everything to give that right and Obama is what we get. We could have chosen to vote for someone else but we were to busy watching survivor to go vote.

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  3. I love Obama with all my heart and he is a fair, human and honest first president in history of the USA. So don't harm him. Let him do his job.
    I love you Obama and Michelle first black lady:)

    Reply
    • It the best you've got is to comment that this story is fake… you should save your comments for something else!

  4. Sarah would never let something like this happen if BO and the democrats hadn't stripped away our civil liberties and placated the masses with their liberal brainwashing reality TV. WE the people should be doing something to restore Christianity to it's rightful place in this great nation. WE the people need to wake up, we need action NOW! We don't need to let this slide, we don't need to wait until we wake up one day to a world without elections or christmas!

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  5. Obama is completely justified in cancelling the election. The legislators were voted for once already. Why should everyone have to vote again? That would be stupid waste of time. it's more important that good democratic laws get passed by the democrats. No one wants a republican controlled house anyway. It's a shame more presidents didn't have the guts to do this. Obama is clearly the best president we've ever had. God Bless his Christian heart.

    Reply
    • How is he the best president we've ever had? His spending is outrageous and our national debt is huge! Jobs are at the lowest point since the Depression. He wants to heavily tax the people who create jobs and give the money to illegal aliens who will then vote him in for a second term – how is that right? He puts our nation down to other countries' leaders. He takes vacations when we are having national crises. His promise for "transparency" is a joke, proved by the passing of his Health Care Reform which contains many hidden taxes that have nothing to do with health care.

    • You apparently aren't aware of what this non-American, false president and his minions have done to the Constitution and to this country. He uses taxpayers money to support Muslims and signs treaties without congressinal input. Don't let him know that you asked God to bless him, because he doesn't believe in God. He is doing this to maintain a firm grip to finish his work of destroying everything this country is supposed to be.

    • YOU are a moron Hagbard! Obama is NOT a christian, nor a loyal American, nor is he a flag saluting citizen!
      We have elections in this damn country and no kenyan with a forked tongue and a commie support group is going to change that! ARE YOU OUT OF YOU MIND? Read his book if you dont believe anyone but him! He tells you he will side with the muslims if push comes to shove! How Christian is that? Muslim IS a religion!
      You ought to be ashamed of yourself siding with politics instead of being loyal to this country.We are in trouble and your praising the nitwit that is getting us deeper and deeper in the dung of his socialist muck!

    • Seriously, Hagbardceline, none of these morons can see that your tongue is planted firmly in your cheek. LOL!

    • Now we are getting somewhere. And if healthcare covered Republican sterilization… we'd be on our way back from the brink (where GWB left us!).

  6. Hey guys, you do know that this a fake article from a fake newspaper. It's like the onion.com. It's comedy at it's best. You may want to read the National Review….

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    • Wait. This is so silly. After the Citizens United decision by the Supreme Court, the Republicans had already cancelled the real election. Obama is too late.

    • WWN is the truly accurate source of investigative reporting. Dont question the credentials of a journalistic icon just to push your own agenda. It is skeptics like you that brutally murdered the tooth fairy, and are threatening Easter Bunny and Santa.
      Dont spoil it for those who just want the facts.

  7. Wait. This is so silly. After the Citizens United Supreme Court decision, the Republicans had already cancelled the election. Obama is too late.

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  8. He wants to monitor our internet, take away our guns, control everything! He wants to make the government so big and so powerful that the citizens are no longer free. He has violated the Constitution and called it old-fashioned, not pertinent to today's world. Lastly, I am not a racist and didn't teach that to my children, but HE is most certainly racist and stirs it up whenever he gets the chance. And what's with all the secrecy regarding his past? Why did no one care about his former friends (terrorists, racists, his Muslim ties)? He is a handsome, articulate man who projects an air of confidence, which is why I personally believe he was elected.

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  9. I love you guys… keep on spreading lies… maybe there's one guy that might believe you and vote for you… keep on showing that you're ignorants to the whole world…

    Reply
    • Oh com e on Damcracie! Lets be honest, you wouldn't have read the article if you didn't find it just a tad bit entertaining! So if you look at it in that light of what could be, might be, or is to come you can kind of take the weekly world news website as it is… entertainment!

    • Clearly it's fake, but honestly, can you see him actually trying to pull this? I can..he knows he's about to get his ass handed to him so pull a Clinton and divert attention…loser

  10. lol wow how dumb are people! i mean really! this lie has been circulating for far too long now. first of all it is not within his power to do that. not only does it violate the constitution it would send this country into civil war. but many sheeple out there are probably following the borowitz report and are dumb to the truth lol. that report has Obama back with 100% of the votes. lol not sure where they get their data but the mainstream media is even saying how little support that guy has right now. wake up people and stop being so arrogant!

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    • Aw, hello Bob. That's exactly why Obama is doing this. He's looking for a reason to stay president and destroy this country. And if it starts a Civil War in this country, then that's even better for him. He's not what everyone thinks he is.

    • in you thing mitt romney going to do any better when he dont have a clue how it works that why he got chewed up in that last debate they put us here remember bush in dick if you was in his shoes you wouldnt know wat to do like romney in if you like him so much hope you make over 600k cuz if not your apart of the 47% of people he dont care about in war messing wit mitt romney were going to be a third world coutry so pick wat one of your sister your going to make your first wife and keep your blood line pure sometime the grass isnt greener on the other side

    • and your right there with Obama all the time so you know that this is a lie?? what makes you any more or less of a "sheeple" yourself, only your one for "the other side"

    • you might need the bill the prez pass the constitution dont mean nothing in he do have the power to do it pick up a book or go on line you dont know wat you are talking about cuz you havent seen it done its pass already your late

  11. I’m madder than a lesbian Girl Scouts councellor at a Birkenstock clearance sale that doesn’t have sizes over 13 about this. Obama has completely abandoned the GLBT crowd and to make matters worse he’s embraced the heterosexuals, even the sodomites among them….talk about a double standard!!
    Unless he’s willing to knock up the Mrs. and force her to have a late term abortion he is NOT getting my vote next time, it’s going to Herman Cain!!!

    Reply
  12. I have thought that was the reason Obama is supporting the occupy Wall Street through out the country – most every large city has one, all it would take a large attack in one for them to declare Marshal law.

    Reply
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    Reply
  14. Not only is he cancelling All elections . .. he has declared himself the winner of next season's
    American Idol, recipient of the Oscar for Best Actor in a Horror Movie, Declared himself Prince of Mars
    and given himself two more Nobel Peace Prizes for arrogance and duplicity

    Reply
  15. You actually make it appear really easy along with your presentation but I to find this topic to be really one thing which I feel I might by no means understand. It kind of feels too complicated and extremely vast for me. I’m taking a look ahead on your subsequent put up, I will attempt to get the grasp of it!

    Reply
  16. …Hegel…gave us Enzyklopadie der philosophischen Wissenschaften im Grundrisse…..Karel Dobbelaere..The Soka Gakkai…Reach Enlightenment in this world by chanting the invocation (daimoku) of the Lotus Sutra…..And lastly my take on the Buridan Insoluble of our times…..We need a president who becomes a philosopher, or a philosopher who wants to be president…..He must not owe to anyone who would bring him gifts…But rather he must send the gifts in the way of virtue to those he has allegiance true!!!! And lastly…..Few hurts which human beings can sustain are greater , and none wound more, than when that on which they habitually and with full assurance relied, fails them in the hour of need. And few wrongs are greater than this mere withholding of good, and none excite more resentment , either in the person suffering, or in a sympathizing spectator. The principle, therefore, of giving to each what they deserve, that is, good for good, as well as evil for evil, is not only included within the idea of Justice as we have defined it, but is a proper object of that intensity of sentiment which places the Just, in human estimation, above the simply Expedient……………………………………………

    Reply
    • Speak English Man! Not textbook garble that hypothesizes concepts not relevant to the subject and of little interest to anyone but you.

    • look its to late yall should have got out their to stop that bill he pass but we didnt now people are looking dum its to late dont let a color stand in the way cuz you will put a person who like to keep that blood line pure if you know that i mean can you see brothers in sisters having kids together cuz they do pick up a book read on him in his people see if your heart feel the same

  17. Obama declares a national emergency
    President Obama sent a letter to the Speaker of the House of Representatives and to the President of the Senate on June 25, 2012, announcing his declaration of national emergency.
    http://www.canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/
    Stealth State of Emergency:
    While We Were Sleeping
    – Dr. Ileana Johnson Paugh Friday, June 29, 2012

    Reply

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