On the surface, it looks like a collection of childish whims and cheap toys all for the affordable price of a couple of coins. At its heart it is ruthless and deadly serious business. Deadly enough in fact that the name of our contact for this article has been changed in order to protect the … READ MORE
If your cat’s baffling behavior sometimes seems out of this world, there could be a good reason — your spaceD-out kitty may hail from Mars! Scientists say that 1 in 10 American house cats appear to be from Mars. A number of Martian cats were recently photographed on the Red Planet by the Hubble telescope. … READ MORE
Vampire on Wheels Wows Crowds! Ever since he was young, Count Alexandru Craioveanu had a thing for American culture. “Call me Alex,” he says. “That’s a start. I can’t get with the long names, the final u’s. Just plain old Alex.” Being “plain old” anything has been a lifelong struggle. Alex’s father, a disgraced Romanian … READ MORE
“WE’RE BEING ASSAULTED BY LIVERWURST!” SAYS CITIZEN The town of Maudlin, Mississippi had been coping with the pandemic and the ensuing financial problems well enough. But hell broke loose right before Christmas. According to Maudlin Mayor Bruce Paisley, the town found itself attacked by meat. “We were all doing our part with masks and social … READ MORE
Gets Too Fat To Fly Home The quiet town of Newport, Vermont didn’t expect a visit from extraterrestrial life this summer but that’s exactlywhat it got on a humid afternoon in June. Shocked commuters watched as a small spacecraft touched down near the gas station on Sias Avenue around 2pm. The pilot, a tiny grey … READ MORE
HE WENT INTO HIDING DURING THE SPANISH FLU OF 1918 John Cronley was just an infant when he and his family headed to their bunker in 1918. Unfortunately, he chose the wrong time to rejoin humanity. “Holy katzenjammers’ kids!” Cronley said. “My timing is the pits!” Cronley and his parents thought The Spanish Flu would … READ MORE
The U.S. Treasury officials made a big announcement today: China Buys Mount Rushmore. A Chinese investment firm, Jiang Yu Woo, made the purchase. The company told Weekly World News that the deal closed today. Specific details of the agreement have not yet been released. However, it is rumored to be similar to a deal in … READ MORE
Market Madness CONTINUES AT CONVENIENCE STORES! Over this past week, online communities have demonstrated that they can disrupt the stock market, making certain stock prices soar way above their presumed value. Companies like Gamestop and AMC, buoyed by online campaigns, demonstrated “meme-stock” growth that baffled long-time market watchers and even led to the suspension of … READ MORE
AND HE HATES “MEANIES!” While “adults” across the nation play a political game of “Mad Libs” concerning election fraud, the small town of Facepalms, Florida, is actually prosecuting a proven case; a case that led to the appointment of a 5-year-old judge, Peter “Puck” Smezworthy. Harry Towers, the Mayor of Facepalms, laughs over it all. … READ MORE
