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Animals

ZOMBIE DOGS ATTACK

January 12, 2023January 12, 2023 by Shirley Everglade

Reports of Zombie Dogs ARE increasing in Texas! People in the small town of Millfield, a suburb of Dallas are seeing packs of snarling, undead canines. They are roaming the … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines, Mutants, Paranormal Tags animals, zombies

GROUNDHOG DEAD!

February 1, 2022February 1, 2022 by Elsa Akesson

PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA – Punxsutawney Phil was found dead this morning in an apparent suicide.

Categories Animals, Headlines Tags Groundhog Day, Pennsylvannia, Phil, Punxsutawney Pennsylvania, Punxsutawney Phil

WEREWOLF ESCAPES FROM ALABAMA PRISON!

November 18, 2021November 17, 2021 by Frank Lake

FEROCIOUS BEAST LEAVES TRAIL OF TERROR IN DEEP SOUTH! A savage, snarling werewolf has escaped from prison! The werewolf viciously attacked seven cops and overturned a police cruiser in Mobile, … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines Tags alabama, beasts, prisons, werewolf

IS YOUR CAT FROM MARS?

June 14, 2021February 17, 2021 by Marge Floori

If your cat’s baffling behavior sometimes seems out of this world, there could be a good reason — your spaceD-out kitty may hail from Mars! Scientists say that 1 in … READ MORE

Categories Advice, Animals, Headlines Tags cats, martians

MASSACHUSETTS MAN SAVES TODDLERS FROM VICIOUS FISHER CAT!

June 15, 2021September 2, 2020 by Frank Lake

HE DOVE ACROSS A LARGE STREAM, FOUGHT THE BEAST OFF WITH HIS BARE HANDS! If you are looking for good news these days, here is a story of bravery that … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines Tags fish

SINKHOLE TURNS OUT TO BE GIANT RABBIT HOLE!

June 14, 2021August 12, 2020 by Brick Rivers

“WE ARE SO SCREWED,” SAYS THE MAYOR The town of Slackjaw, South Dakota has seen its share of hard times. It’s been pummeled by summer thunderstorms, has skirted swarms of … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines, Science Tags rabbits

EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL UNION ON STRIKE!

June 14, 2021May 12, 2020 by Dunwich Dundorfer

A hush spreads across the menagerie gathered at Local 745. Their shop steward, Pickles, is about to address the members of the Emotional Support Animal Union.  “Fellow Comfort Creatures…” Pickles … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines Tags cats, dogs

ANIMALS RECLAIM CITY NIGHTLIFE DURING LOCKDOWN!

June 15, 2021May 8, 2020 by Brick Rivers

“MUCH TO OUR SURPRISE, THEY SEEM TO BE FREQUENTING MUSIC CLUBS.” Dr. Atlas Mulrooney, a renowned British zoologist, has long predicted that, should humans recede from their cities and towns, … READ MORE

Categories Animals

BUTTFISH WASH ASHORE IN FLORIDA!

June 15, 2021March 12, 2020 by Brick Rivers

MOVE OVER, PENIS FISH! HERE COME THE BUTTS! Last year, California was treated to “penis fish.” Today, on the Florida coast, it’s ‘butt fish!’ In December of last year, a … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines, Mutants Tags fish, florida

WHITE HOUSE FILLS SLOT FOR PRESIDENTIAL PET

June 14, 2021March 5, 2020 by Brick Rivers

IT’S A SNARLING BADGER! For three years, now, the mainstream media has been harassing President Donald Trump about not having a family pet. The Fake News reporters would remind him … READ MORE

Categories Animals, Headlines Tags badger, President Trump
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