Folks, I’m so steamed I could fry an egg on my forehead! Airline travel these days is a one-way ticket to Miseryville, and I’m sick and tired of it! Back in the good ol’ days, flying was a treat—stewardesses in sharp uniforms, legroom you could stretch a horse in, and meals that didn’t taste like … READ MORE
Well, slap my hide and call me a patriot, folks! The day I’ve been hollerin’ about for years has finally come, and I’m madder than a wet hen that it took this long! President Donald J. Trump—God bless that beautiful head of hair—has signed an executive order that’s gonna make America’s showers great again, and … READ MORE
Well, folks, I’m madder than a hornet in a windstorm, and it’s all because of these blasted tariffs that President Trump just slapped on the world like a big ol’ “Made in America” sticker! I’m telling you, I’ve been steaming ever since I heard about this “Liberation Day” nonsense—10% on everything coming into the good … READ MORE
Folks, I’m madder than a wet hen in a tote sack, and you know why? Paper straws! Those limp, soggy, good-for-nothing excuses for drinking implements have been shoved down our throats—literally—for years now by the tree-hugging, granola-crunching, save-the-planet nitwits who think they’re smarter than the rest of us. Well, I’ve had it up to my … READ MORE
Listen up, you green-beer-guzzling, shamrock-waving lunatics—I’ve had it up to my eyeballs with this St. Patrick’s Day baloney! Every March, the whole country turns into a bunch of giggling, emerald-clad nitwits, prancing around like leprechauns on a bender, and I’m madder than a wet hen in a hailstorm about it! This holiday is nothing but … READ MORE
Folks, I’m so steamed up right now I could melt the paint off a battleship! They’ve gone and done it this time. Plopped a 60-foot Kim Kardashian balloon right smack in the middle of Times Square like it’s some kind of national treasure! I saw the pictures, and let me tell you, I nearly choked … READ MORE
I’m madder than a porcupine in a balloon factory over this Zelensky-Trump-Vance circus in the Oval Office last week! That meeting got my blood pressure higher than a cat’s back in a dog pound. I’m talking about that so-called “meeting” between President Trump and that Ukrainian fella, Zelensky. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love … READ MORE
I’m madder than a leprechaun with a crooked shillelagh about St. Patrick’s Day!
I’m madder than a Arab with a three-legged camel about Al Gore selling his network to the enemy.
