Folks, I’m madder than a wet hen in a hailstorm, and if you’re not, you ain’t paying attention! This country’s going to hell in a handbasket, and the latest proof is that music mogul Sean “Diddy” Combs is turning Tinsel Town into a one-man crime spree! I’m telling you, this guy’s got Hollywood shaking in … READ MORE
Folks, I’m so steamed I could boil my own head in a pot of clam chowder! Just when you think the world can’t get any dumber, those pointy-headed Eurocrats in Brussels go and prove me wrong. Word on the street—and by street, I mean the patriotic pavement of Main Street, USA—is that the European Union … READ MORE
Folks, I’m so steamed I could fry an egg on my forehead! Airline travel these days is a one-way ticket to Miseryville, and I’m sick and tired of it! Back in the good ol’ days, flying was a treat—stewardesses in sharp uniforms, legroom you could stretch a horse in, and meals that didn’t taste like … READ MORE
ZOMBIE BUNNIES: Authorities Urge Calm and Peeps Sacrifice According to several eyewitness accounts, the bunnies were not only animated but exhibited coordinated pack behavior, strategic hopping, and an apparent thirst for blood—or at least warm bodies. Easter Morning Turns into a Marshmallow Massacre In what experts are calling the “sweetest nightmare imaginable,” Easter festivities took … READ MORE
Well, slap my hide and call me a patriot, folks! The day I’ve been hollerin’ about for years has finally come, and I’m madder than a wet hen that it took this long! President Donald J. Trump—God bless that beautiful head of hair—has signed an executive order that’s gonna make America’s showers great again, and … READ MORE
PACIFIC OCEAN, OREGON – April 10, 2025. Fishermen off the coast of Oregon are reeling in more than they bargained for. They netted a bizarre creature. This catch has got scientists baffled and conspiracy theorists buzzing: a half-sardine, half-human hybrid that’s being dubbed “The Sardine Sapiens”! The shocking discovery happened last Tuesday, A grizzled fisherman … READ MORE
Well, folks, I’m madder than a hornet in a windstorm, and it’s all because of these blasted tariffs that President Trump just slapped on the world like a big ol’ “Made in America” sticker! I’m telling you, I’ve been steaming ever since I heard about this “Liberation Day” nonsense—10% on everything coming into the good … READ MORE
🔥 “Are you ready for the hottest, most electrifying phenomenon in the universe? Watch as these unstable blobs of ionized gas go completely out of control! They split, merge, and EXPLODE—no laws of physics can contain them!” 🔥 📡 Introducing: PLASMOIDS GONE WILD! 📡 🚀 For the first time ever, witness exclusive, uncensored footage of … READ MORE
Folks, I’m madder than a wet hen in a tote sack, and you know why? Paper straws! Those limp, soggy, good-for-nothing excuses for drinking implements have been shoved down our throats—literally—for years now by the tree-hugging, granola-crunching, save-the-planet nitwits who think they’re smarter than the rest of us. Well, I’ve had it up to my … READ MORE
High Alert Over the High Seas The British Royal Navy found itself in deep water this week after mistaking a particularly gassy whale for a hostile Russian drone. Reports indicate that a routine patrol in the North Sea turned chaotic when sonar operators detected what they believed to be an “unidentified underwater threat” moving erratically … READ MORE