ALABAMA – 70 dead dolphins washed ashore. It was not due to the BP Oil Spill. Authorities confirmed the deaths were caused by aliens from Planet Zeeba.
SAN DIEGO – Scientists believe the world is running out of breathable air.
NEW YORK, NY – If it were up to Brad Pitt – BP would have to face some serious consequences!
COUNTY WILTSHIRE – Archaeologists working for BP have made a startling new find at Stonehenge – oil.
NEW ORLEANS – BP wants the oil spill to go away so bad that it’s resorting to extreme measures.
LOS ANGELES – Judge Marsha Revel threw tarballs at Lindsay Lohan’s while sentencing her to jail.
NEW YORK, NY – New York state, desperate for money, has agreed to sell Coney Island to the Merpeople.