COPIAPO, CHILE –  In an agreement between the U.S. and  Chile — for each miner brought up, they will send down one U.S.  politician.

Chile, and the world, is rejoicing in the rescue of the 33 miners trapped underground since August 5th.  This is a great achievement for all involved.  Prayers have been answered:

Since U.S. mining experts aided in the rescue, the President of Chile, Sebastian Pinera said he wanted to do something to give back to Americans.

The mining experts from the U.S. came up with the perfect idea:  for each Chilean miner brought up, we will send down one U.S. Politician.  The Chileans happily agreed to accommodate the miners – so grateful were they for the help.

This has all been cleared with the Obama Administration.  The only drawback is that President Obama wants to name the 33 politicians to be sent down into the Chilean mine.   But the United Mine Workers convinced President Obama to let them make the selections.

The first two U.S. Politicians to be sent down into the mine will be Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid.  Senator Reid was not happy:

Other politicians on the list include:

John McCain

John Kerry

Charlie Rangel

Maxine Waters

Lindsey Graham

Ben Nelson

Olympia Snowe

Barney Frank

Patty Murray

Barbara Boxer

Arnold Schwarzenegger – though he may have trouble fitting in the tube

Rahm Emanuel

Eliot Spitzer

Christine O’Donnell

The White House is being flooded with possible names to be considered.

Not everyone is happy with the miner-for-politician swap.  “I’m not going down there.  No way, ” said Rep. Alan Grayson of Florida, who has been short-listed for the swap.  “I think we should send down the Wall Street fatcats who got us into this mess.   We’ve been doing our best in Congress… it’s the Wall Street devils that have ruined this country.”

Alan Grayson was moved to the top of the list.

The politicians will spend at least 88 days in the mine – then they will be brought out one-by-one… as long as they promise never to run for office again.

The final list of politicians is not decided yet, so do you have any suggestions??

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  1. Why isn't Sarah Palin on this list? I thought she would be near the top .. and someone take Arnold off the list, he is orchestrating the sale of California to China!

  2. Please add the entire Bush & Obama administrations! Partisanship is entirely unwarranted. They all gotta go! Que se vayan todos!

    • While your at it, most of Congress is pretty useless. They can argue about which baseball players took steroids in the mine .. no one will miss them

  3. I've heard a few of the miners have already asked to go back down to retrieve personal belongings and/or to escape all the hustle & bustle topside.

  4. Maxine Waters is risky with all the media involved. When she gets in front of cameras she likes to start race riots and class wars.

  5. How do they choose which miner comes up each hour? And better yet, which politician they send down first? It takes one hour to move through the mine, which is a terrible long time to be in a small capsule


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