HOLLYWOOD, CA – Elton John Becomes a Dad, adopts space alien.
Sir Elton John creator of smash hits like Tiny dancer, The Bitch is Back and Rocket Man now has a little rocket man of his own. The knighted musical wonder and his husband David Furnish have become parents. However, the yellow brick road to parenthood was not as easy as skipping off to Oz.
In a world with social prejudice against race and sexual orientation, it comes as no surprise that even a flamboyantly wealthy rock star would have issues with adoption.
“We never realized how difficult it would be to adopt a baby,” said John, “even the Chinese gave us a hard time about it and they have billions of babies to give away.”
Thankfully the Kǐndðrkænŧarians, who recently attempted to destroy the Skype telecommunications system, were kind enough to step in and allow the couple to adopt one of their own.
“We have really come to love humans and especially the music of Sir Elton John. We love to drink fl¢gerµotæl and get kµrglœrdöred up while listening to Rocket Man,” said Hårŧolësr the Kǐndðrkænŧarian vessel’s first mate that is still orbiting the earth’s moon, “We really feel like we can connect to that song.”
The couple has decided to name their child, Gþąrlðck, after the Kǐndðrkænŧarian captian who showed great compassion to the human race after he halted the attack on earth last week.
“We are so grateful for what the Kǐndðrkænŧarians have done for us. We just hope that little Gþąrlðck will not have to grow up with the same prejudices that we had to,” said Furnish.
And wouldn’t you know it, WWN photographer Boy Mack was right there to grab this photo of the new born space baby.

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  1. this article deeply touched me in a way that is indescribable.
    I wouldn't mind if you put in a good word for me with the Kǐndðrkænŧarians because i am a single parent who has had great difficulty in adopting a child.
    I feel that adopting an alien baby would give me a brighter future and further develop me into a mother who has experienced diversity.
    Thank you Elton John!You are my savior. <3

  2. I'm getting sick reading this. This baby shouldn't be raised by gays. He should have a totally normal family. A normal five-legged mother with an additional eye on the back of her head, a caring greenish father with two mouths. But no homosexuals!

    • I agree every alien deserves a mom and a dad. This alien debauchery to have 4 dads and 15 mothers must stop.

  3. Im happy for Elton John and his husband on raising the alien child. It shows that someday we may create peace upon a universal plane of existence.


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