KENTUCKY CHUPACABRA

LEBANON, KY –  A man shot and killed a chupacabra in Kentucky!
A man in Lebanon Junction, Ky., spotted a chupacabra on his property and shot it dead.
Local politicians believe that the chupacabra was released into Kentucky by the Obama Administration because they are not happy with the Republican-leaning citizens of the Bluegrass State.
Robert Gibbs, White House Press Secretary, however, denied that allegation.  “We have not released any beasts into any state at any time.”  Gibbs added with a smile, “though if Sarah Palin ever sees Big Foot, we might have something to do with that.”
Pressed about whether he knew about any chupacabras running wild in Kentucky, Gibbs said, ” There is no concrete evidence that chupacabras exist, anywhere.”
Hmmm… That’s strange.  WWN had a report this summer about The Obama Administration releasing several chupacabras into Arizona after they passed their immigration law.  The release of chupcabras was confirmed by multiple reports by authorities in Arizona.  Read the full WWN report on this event.
In Kentucky, Mark Cothren said he shot down the animal with whiskers and big ears and denies that it was a house cat – as some people call it.  He also rejects comments from some neighbors speculating that was a coyote or a hairless rat.  “It’s a chupacabra.  No doubt about it,” said Cothren.
Researchers at the University of Louisville confirmed that the animal was, in fact, a chupacabra. Lebanon Police Chief also confirmed that it was a chupacabra.  “I don’t know what a chupacabra is, but I know all the animals that roam these parts and that thing, well I ain’t never seen nothing like it before. So, if Mark says it’s a chupacabra, then I say it’s a chupacabra.”

Professor Anna Pfeffer, of the University of Illinois, a specialist in chupacabras and a MacArthur Grant winner for her work with beasts and harpies, flew into Kentucky to examine the carcass.  “It’s definitely a male chupacabra. I’m 100% sure.  I’ve shot twenty or thirty of them myself, even choked some to death with my own bare hands.  They can be vicious and extremely dangerous.  I think Mr. Cothren did a remarkable job of slaying the beast.”
Professor Pfeffer wanted to take the dead beast back with her to Illinois, but Cothren wouldn’t let her.  “I plan on grilling that goat sucker as soon as I can,” Cothren said.

Cothren  invited the media to view the body of the goat sucker (as it’s called in some countries).  The beast was prowling his property looking for something to kill and eat.
Here’s a YouTube video Mr. Cothren made about his kill:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfKNjZtj8-4&w=480&l=385]

26 thoughts on “KENTUCKY CHUPACABRA”

  1. seriously, and you americans think us europeans are crazy??? you can't be serious here, this website is the most crzy thing on the planet! or wait, no, of the universe, since you guys think aliens are coming for us LMAO

    Reply
  2. Does anyone have a good recipe for chupacabra enchiladas? I tried my mom's old chupacabra quesadilla recipe, which was good but not great. Want to take my tender chupacabra up a notch! Totally open to other suggestions.

    Reply
  3. What did this poor creature did to deserve being shoot to death?!
    Maybe this murderer, Mark Cothren, just killed the last one (if not the only one) of this kind of specimen/creature.
    And that hillbilly, Professor Anna Pfeffer, of the University of Illinois, a specialist in crap……lacks of Scientific Ethic!

    Reply
  4. People get your facts straight before you start spreading rumors. That doesn't look like the ones they're finding in Texas………………………………….Besides, what's wrong with finding a new species of animal? God created all of them anyway………………………………………….They all have some purpose in life.

    Reply
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