DO YOU WONDER WHY SOME PEOPLE LOOK & ACT like the living dead? WELL THEY ARE! Your next-door neighbor or co-worker may be a shambling, mindless zombie trapped in a strange twilight existence between life and death! That’s the alarming warning of a top expert, who says as many as. one in 27 Americans is … READ MORE
LOBBYISTS CRY FOUL! In a once in a 17-year event, Cicadas will emerge from their underground nests across the nation. Thisincludes the District of Columbia. Lobbyists are panicking. “This could be a disaster,” Noted Jolene Small, Head of the DC Lobbyists ofAmerica Association. “These insects are really loud. They may well drone out everything we … READ MORE
Reverse-o-Rama! At first, when Mary Ford Markonen was wearing the coat, it seemed normal to her. “It was a trench coat, gabardine, with a removable lining and raglan sleeves, not too long, not too short, just under the knee. I liked it because it was a real nice rust-red. It was cold all fall so … READ MORE
He’s lost 100’s of Billions trading Bitcoin and Gamestop He may be infallible when it comes to religious doctrine, but Pope Francis has recently been taking on huge day-trading losses. “He’s horrible at trading the markets. When he buys something it goes down, and when he sells short, the markets soar,” complained Cardinal Mario DiSoldi, … READ MORE
THE UNTOLD TOLL OF LOCKDOWN I’ve been feeling an uptick in paranormal energy. The free-floating wandering kind. I’m sure you’ve noticed it, too. To find out what’s been going on I contacted Charlie Mason of The Veil, an elite ghost hunting team. He confirmed what I’d been sensing. “We’re getting a lot more ghost hunting … READ MORE
NOBODY NOTICES When WEEKLY WORLD NEWS heard rumors of a gnarly monster stalking New York City, we began to investigate. Unfortunately, no New Yorkers had heard of this prehistoric creature. Finally, we were contacted by a roving mime, who said he’d seen the creature near where the old Fulton Fish Market used to be in … READ MORE
AND BOY WERE THOSE DISCIPLES A PAIN IN THE BUTT! Restaurant owner Tyler Reggie was a busboy at The Last Supper. The 55-year-old owner of the chic Miami Beach eatery Cheeky Sands was regressed through hypnotherapy to recall the historic dinner. “I was having problems getting along with the customers in my new establishment,” says … READ MORE
DISSATISFIED WITH ANY PART OF YOUR LIFE OR WORLD? JUST SUPER-SIZE IT! The largely positive reception of Zack Snyder’s director’s cut of Justice League, which reverses many of the edits of Joss Wheedon’s version and furnishes fans with a four-hour restored epic, has spurred Snyder to apply the same philosophy to other works and artifacts. … READ MORE
SUPERDAD IS BORN! It was a normal, brisk winter day at the Mifflin Street Target store in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Shoppers were coming and going as usual. One of these customers, Reginald Jenkins was there with his wife and daughter. It was soon going to be a day none of them would ever forget. “We were … READ MORE
Children’s books activate agents! A recent study has shown that some popular children’s books contain a hidden code that, if activated, can turn ordinary parents into sleeper agents. “Let me start by saying that this is implausible but true,” says Sharon Ferkins, a former librarian who now heads up the Association Against Books Containing Covert … READ MORE