FACEBOOK WILL END ON MARCH 15th, 2012!

Posted on Sunday, February 19th, 2012
By

PALO ALTO, CA –Mark Zuckerberg announced that Facebook will be shut down in March of 2012. Managing the site has become too stressful.

“Facebook has gotten out of control,” said Zuckerberg in a press conference outside his Palo Alto office, “and the stress of managing this company has ruined my life. I need to put an end to all the madness.”

Zuckerberg went on to explain that starting March 15th of next year, users will no longer be able to access their Facebook accounts.  That gives users (and Facebook addicts) a year to adjust to life without Facebook.

“After March 15th, 2012 the whole website shuts down,” said Avrat Humarthi, Vice President of Technical Affairs at Facebook. “So if you ever want to see your pictures again, I recommend you take them off the internet. You won’t be able to get them back after Facebook goes out of business.”

Zuckerberg said the decision to shut down Facebook was difficult, but that he does not think people will be upset.

“I personally don’t think it’s a big deal,” he said in a private phone interview. “And to be honest, I think it’s for the better. Without Facebook, people will have to go outside and make real friends. That’s always a good thing.”

Some Facebook users were furious upon hearing the shocking news.

“What am I going to do without Facebook?” said Denise Bradshaw, a high school student from Indiana. “My life revolves around it. I’m on Facebook at least 10 hours a day. Now what am I going to do with all that free time?”

However, parents across the country have been experiencing a long anticipated sense of relief.

“I’m glad the Facebook nightmare is over,” said Jon Guttari, a single parent from Detroit. “Now my teenager’s face won’t be glued to a computer screen all day. Maybe I can even have a conversation with her.”

SIGN THE “SAVE FACEBOOK” PETITION HERE

Those in the financial industry are criticizing Zuckerberg for walking away from a multibillion dollar franchise. Facebook is currently ranked as one of the wealthiest businesses in the world, with economists estimating its value at around 7.9 billion.

But Zuckerberg remains unruffled by these accusations. He said he will stand by his decision to give Facebook the axe.

“I don’t care about the money,” said Zuckerberg. “I just want my old life back.”

The Facebook Corporation suggests that users remove all of their personal information from the website before March 15th, 2012. After that date, all photos, notes, links, and videos will be permanently erased.

!!!!CHECK OUT THE LATEST UPDATE ON THIS BREAKING STORY!!!!

[Note: comments on this article close out at 25,000.  After that, please go to the update article to post your thoughts. Thank you. WWN.]


22451 Comments For This Post

  1. Andrew says:

    There is always msn, yahoo, skype and the list goes on

  2. guest says:

    Skype! chat & vid call for free.

  3. Sherry says:

    GET HIS EMAIL ADDRESS AND PHONE NUMBER AND HOME ADDRESS. FACEBOOK DOES NOT KEEP YOUR CONNECTION ALIVE WITH YOUR DAD IT ONLY HELPED!

  4. Vince says:

    It's funny people forget Email for godsake or even fucking male.. FUCK!

  5. manam says:

    have u heard about skype or msn?

  6. Melissa says:

    This is a site which makes up crazy stories to post for laughs. They sometimes write about things like an alien and Bigfoot having a litter of babies and then selling them for top dollar to A-listers. I don't think that exact article has ever been written, but I've seen things similar to that before.

  7. Lili says:

    Contact your dad through skpe or oovoo

  8. kimy159 says:

    my dad lives across the country and i see him evry4 years so i get it, it really stinks :(

  9. Gabrielle says:

    yeah, and aim, gmail. dont feel bad! i garantee you'll be able to continue contacting your father.

  10. yhjn tyh says:

    its all a joke, silly.

  11. lovely13 says:

    shut up. your ruining it.

  12. dgbgb says:

    ruining wut exactly?

  13. john smith says:

    Time for your medication.? These are all strangers.!!!

  14. Jaffa says:

    lol i agree…the e-mail address comes out soon for facebook….so obviously this is fake

  15. sara says:

    hahahahaha

  16. @vhonmark says:

    yeahhh,,., your right

  17. avery says:

    This BETTER be fake. or ima screw ur face mark!!!!!! jks. but seriously, if this is not fake, everyone will hate u. just saying.

  18. Luibeat says:

    Why shut down facebook? I think you must not focus for those people disturbed or dislikes fb because they are only few. While almost 90% of people using fb likes this site coz it connects you with friends and family at it’s Best. I would be sad that this thing is happening. Hihuhu I hope zuckerburg can read this…. Coz fb help me alot… Peace be with you! And Godbless!

  19. Monique says:

    I agree helped me too I recently found my sisters tht I didn’t kno I had so I think Facebook Is useful

  20. whwg says:

    And you can’t forget about the marketing empire it is. Not just a social network its more than that now. Dude, get a manager to stress on it, mr billionair who sayd YOU hafta run it? U can tell he’s just a kid now!

  21. Barbara says:

    Thank you. I see sarcasm (or whatever you want to call it) written all over that article. I’m not taking this serious. It’s funny how it pokes fun of people not having a life because of facebook. Lol.

  22. heaim says:

    good do it.

  23. Tre says:

    Wow, satire completely escapes sooo many people. Are you people commenting even concious?

  24. Calm says:

    Its a hoax =)

  25. xPP says:

    Dude how are you going to be doing something this guy is doing if you cant even spell right?

  26. devinrao says:

    its not a crap mike..its a business strategies planning to sell proxies maybe..if he close it than its sounds stupid…its a 7.9 multi billion industry

  27. nold strong says:

    sana d m2loy ang shutdown ng facebook…..i will cry huhuhuhuhu………..

  28. guest says:

    thats the whole point of weekly world news is to make up stories. gtfo.

  29. leen_riin says:

    Skype is just for chatting and facebook you can chat and play games .
    don’t you think alot ppl want to have fun to ? SO, THINK >:(

  30. Jocelyn says:

    Yah but facebook is better

  31. BoneDogg says:

    because everything on the BBC is real isn't it …………. PMSL!!!

  32. imonster01 says:

    come on internet, the website tells you that aliens will attack earth in 2011 and that Mike Tyson is a pigeon fetish … Jean Cocteau said : "the drama of our time is that stupidness started to think"

    grow up .

  33. FallenOne says:

    do not believe in this rumor. Why would zuckerburg terminate Facebook so suddenly? it may happen if he bumped his head accidentally.. haha..

  34. fitri_malaysian says:

    ya…that's a lie..i don't be believe it will happen..!!!

  35. amitra says:

    yes right.

  36. Mariz says:

    wtf?! Don't end FaceBook please! We love FaceBook, so please don't end FACEBOOK! :'(

  37. aroko says:

    dont you have kids? or parents? or siblings? do you consider them as ur family?

  38. Buenger says:

    People also forgot how to spell mail lol

  39. dumbass says:

    Its mail! Not male…
    Cracker

  40. Yourretared says:

    F*)*ing retard it’s mail not male

  41. john says:

    You mean mail?

  42. The instigator says:

    All you guys are acting like idiots. So what if it closes down. There are hundreds of other social netorking sites. The world won’t end if you can’t play your halfassed rip offs of tetris and bejeweled

  43. m0ther fcuker says:

    fcuk this site…………………a$$ h0le……

    fcuk who has made this fcuken site????

    a$$ h0le

  44. Jeen says:

    If the face book is closed how to play the games?

  45. Tommy says:

    He probably did that to shut everyone up. Lol

  46. makiya says:

    i luv fb n i cnt live widout it……plz plz

  47. Jocelyn roberts says:

    Skype is great but u can connect to more people quicker that skyping people individually and msn is crap

  48. mukesh says:

    i dnt knw how to use skype .any friends can help me plzzz

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