METLATONOC, Mexico – Woman shocked when severed pig’s head predicts future, thousands flock to town.

Doña Maritza of Metaltonoc, a small town located in the southeastern section of Mexico, was beginning to prepare for a posada party when an amazing event took place. A posada party is a traditional Mexican fiesta (Spanish for party) which takes place in the 9 days leading up to Christmas. The festivities commemorate Mary and Joseph’s search for an inn during their time in Bethlehem shortly before the birth of Christ.
Doña Martiza was in her kitchen hard at work on a dish called pozole, a hominy and pork stew traditionally made with the head of a pig. This thick, rich, pork, chile and corn soup is a Christmas Eve tradition among many Mexicans. The stew takes several days to prepare due to its intricate and rigorous process. The dish is often garnished with cabbage, lime, radish, onion and sometimes Doritos. She was just about to place the pig’s head in the stock pot when the swine uttered its first of what would later be many, many words.
“I was so shocked when it spoke that I dropped it right into the pot. It let out the most bloodcurdling squeal so my husband, Jorge, rushed over and quickly pulled it out, ¡Hay Dios mio, que locura!” explained Doña Maritza. To make matters all the more bizarre the severed head not only spoke but it was also claiming to predict the future!

“We had been drinking tequila so at first we thought that the spirits had just gone to our heads. Until there was a knock at the door,” said Consuela Jimenez, Doña Maritza’s younger sister who was there that day assisting with the labor intensive stew. Upon opening the door, the siblings were surprised to see their Uncle Salvador, just as the pig’s head had predicted.
“It was wonderful to see good old Sal again,” said Jorge, “we thought that he was a goner after I sent him off, three years ago, to buy some furry dice to hang from the rearview mirror of my 1973 El Camino. This is truly a Christmas miracle. Not only did he come back with purple dice but correct change too!”
As word has traveled through the region, numerous people have begun to make pilgrimages and wait in long lines in order to see the severed swine’s head for advice, council and a chance to look into their futures.



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  1. did he tell you he is getting a big tax break? yea he is the new talking head on fox. oriely got the rest of the pig?…….. use your imagination…….squeel, squeeeel.


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