EVICTED BUTCHER PUTS CURSE ON TOWN!
“WE’RE BEING ASSAULTED BY LIVERWURST!” SAYS CITIZEN The town of Maudlin, Mississippi had been coping with the pandemic and the ensuing financial problems well enough. But hell broke loose right … READ MORE
Brick Rivers
NEWEST U.S. JUDGE IS 5-YEARS-OLD!
AND HE HATES “MEANIES!” While “adults” across the nation play a political game of “Mad Libs” concerning election fraud, the small town of Facepalms, Florida, is actually prosecuting a proven … READ MORE
NY WOMAN STALKED BY RUSSIAN SUB!
SHE BLAMES DATING APP Like many single people, Sadie Lamar’s life was turned upside down because of the pandemic, but she never thought that she’d be stalked through NYC by … READ MORE
MEET THE GORILLAS OF WALMART!
THEY EVEN HAVE CREDIT CARDS! Walmart has nearly 5,000 stores in America, but only ONE can claim mountain gorillas as regular customers. When WWN heard about these extraordinary customers, we … READ MORE
MAN SELLS SOUL TO DEVIL
DEVIL DEMANDS REFUND! Over the years, Weekly World News has encountered the Devil aka “Lucifer,” “Satan” and “Scratch” in stories that have spanned the globe. When this reporter received a … READ MORE
MOB WAR AVOIDED THROUGH SPELLING BEE
LEARNING TO SPELL “CARNAGE” HELPS THEM AVOID IT! Law enforcement agencies across the nation are breathing a sigh of relief, today, after a full-blown Mafia war was averted through, of … READ MORE
ALIENS ABDUCT COUPLE, DON’T PROBE THEM!
“ON A CERTAIN LEVEL, I’M DISAPPOINTED,” SAYS MAN. It’s not very often that a civilian is invited into Groom Lake, which is the official title of Area 51. It’s the … READ MORE
MEET AMERICA’S “MOST REPULSIVE MAN!”
AND HIS HOUSE IS EVEN WORSE! (EDITOR’S NOTE: WWN is publishing this story because the world needs to know about it – although we vowed to Brick Rivers not to … READ MORE
FLATULENCE SAVES MAN FROM KIDNAPPERS!
“THANK GOD I HAD THAT THIRD BURRITO,” HE EXPLAINS When a black van roared up to Vincent Gardini’s vintage woody wagon in Los Angeles’ Diamond District, forcing him onto the … READ MORE
IS TV’S TONY DANZA OUT TO ‘OUT-GOOP’ GWYNETH?
HIS “BRING ON THE FUNK” FRAGRANT CANDLES ARE DESIGNED FOR MEN. No one can deny that Tony Danza is a Renaissance Man. The beloved TV actor has been, over the … READ MORE