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I blame George W. Bush for all these A-rab terrorist attacks – because he’s not here!

That’s right: these crazy A-rabs are attacking America again because Bush ISN’T in the White House!

How can Bush do what he did for eight whole years – keeping the U.S. of A. safe and sound – when he’s goofing off in Texas someplace, wading through hate mail between naps?

Can’t we just let him VISIT once in a while? Maybe he can give the Teleprompter Kid a few tips?

Oh, I forgot: Bush is a moron and Obama is a genius!

Obama must be pretty smart, because he’s got himself a nice safe job that lets him go golfing and surfing and riding magical unicorns in Hawaii over Christmas. Meanwhile, all those poor peaceful sons of A-rab millionaires are forced to spend their holidays trying to blow up airplanes with flaming jockey shorts or something.

That just shows you the big inequalities in our world that the Communist-in-Chief has promised to get rid of!

And he’s trying, too. He wants to make everybody equal. So now we all get to equally get treated crappy at the airport, even though our name isn’t Mohammed and we’ve got passports and our dad’s didn’t call the cops on us.

Clinton tried to wreck America with HIS burning underwear, but Obama doesn’t need that. He’s ruining the country without even trying!

I don’t understand why the A-rabs don’t just make their own airline and let us fly on ours. They’ve got the money to do it. Then we could fly without having to walk around barefoot through x-ray machines, and they could put their goats in the carry on, and their wives in the cargo hold, and we’d all be happy!