UPDATE: STEVE JOBS STEPPING DOWN

UPDATE: Steve Jobs has just announced he will be taking a leave of absence – in order to complete his gender re-assignment!

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APPLE FOUNDER TO LOSE ADAM’S APPLE

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – It was revealed this week that cancer survivor and Apple CEO Steve Jobs was undergoing hormone therapy to counteract his notable weight loss.

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UPDATE: MACWORLD THREATENED BY DEATH RAY

UPDATE: Death-ray-wielding open source software supporters are expected to crash the MacWorld convention in San Francisco.

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