LAS VEGAS – Michael Bolton announced today that he is running for President of the United States in 2012.
Singer-songwriter, Michael Bolton, told reporters in Las Vegas that he is running for President of the United States in 2012. “It’s time we put a singer in the White House. I want to teach the whole world to sing – in perfect harmony.”
Bolton had been hinting to his audiences in recent weeks, that he was considering a potential presidential bid in 2012. The half-filled houses thought his comments were just part of his act, but he was serious. “I got kicked off Dancing With the Stars in the second week, so I know what it’s like to feel pain, loss, suffering. I can relate to the common person. I don’t want anybody to get kicked off anything. And I promise that won’t happen when I’m President.”
The fifty-seven-year-old singer, who was born in Connecticut, has never voted in his life – not in any local, city or national elections. “I thought it was time I get involved. I don’t write a song unless I think it’s going to be a number one hit and I’m not going to enter politics unless I think I can be number one: President.”
At the press conference today, Bolton cited what he described as President Obama’s failures – “he can’t sing a note.” He said that he has the limited knowledge and limited experience necessary to do limited harm to the country. “I just want to sing, so I won’t be pushing any agenda. I just want to keep things as they are and write a few good songs while I’m in the White House.”
Does Bolton really think he can win? “Absolutely. If I sing love songs on the campaign trail, I know I’ll get the woman vote – and some women.”
Political expert, Larry Sabato of the University of Virginia, said that Bolton has a good chance to win. “There’s a paradigm shift in national politics. All the old rules are out the window. Nobody can predict who will win anymore. It’s a crazy to think that Bolton could win, but in today’s political climate, anything is possible.”
Bolton may have a tough time getting the youth vote, especially since Eminem made this comment. “If Michael Bolton runs for President, I’m gonna to run for Presidential Assassin. I can’t stand listening to his sh*t.”
There’s a lot of people who agree with Eminem, but never doubt a crooner.
Bolton 2012: White House Love Song.
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